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ai_generation_date: '2026-05-08'
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audiodharma:
  talks:
  - date: '2022-09-29'
    mp3_url: https://audiodharma.us-east-1.linodeobjects.com/talks/17012/20220929-Tanya_Wiser-IMC-establishing_a_mindfulness_practice_class_4.mp3
    speakers:
    - speaker_name: Tanya Wiser
      speaker_url: https://www.audiodharma.org/speakers/286
    talk_start_time_seconds: 0
    title: 'Establishing a Mindfulness Practice: Class 4'
    url: https://www.audiodharma.org/talks/17012
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location_city: Redwood City, CA
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  title: 'Establishing a Mindfulness Practice: Class 4 of 4 with Tanya Wiser'
  upload_date: '2022-09-30'
  uploader_str: Insight Meditation Center
  uploader_url: https://www.youtube.com/@InsightMeditationCenter
youtube_url: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PyiYeWpxWjM
---

# Establishing a Mindfulness Practice: Class 4 - [Tanya Wiser](https://www.audiodharma.org/speakers/286)

*This is an AI-generated transcript from auto-generated subtitles for the video above. It likely contains inaccuracies, especially with speaker attribution if there are multiple speakers.*

## [Establishing a Mindfulness Practice: Class 4](https://www.audiodharma.org/talks/17012)

## Introduction and Check-in

If you're comfortable, it will help me if you put a name tag on. If you don't mind, Jim, would you mind bringing a couple of name tags and a pen for anybody? I think there are a couple of people who didn't get one. It helps me; I want to learn your names. Thank you.

Does anybody have any concerns about my taking my mask off? No? Thank you.

This is the fourth week in this four-week series, *Establishing a Practice*. To review, the first week was wise understanding and wise intention. The second week was mindfulness on and off the cushion. The third week was actions that support joy. This week is establishing and sustaining our practice with wise effort. If you signed up for the handouts, it's all in there, and I'll email it to you.

I'm wondering, before I go a little bit more into today's topic, if there are any questions or responses that are residual that I can answer for any of you? All good? Since you don't have any questions for me, I have one for you. Did any of you focus on moments of well-being or joy this week?

**Corey:** Yeah, just little things. Usually, on my walking commute to work, if a car would stop as I walked past, I would give a little wave. I did a little bit of an appreciation journal as well. I would try to write down three appreciations for the day to try to keep in those moments. I think it's a good practice. I'm liking it.

**Tanya Wiser:** How do you know you're liking it? What are the benefits for you?

**Corey:** Well, I guess it's difficult to say. I don't dwell as long or churn as long in the bad things or challenges that come my way. There's this other presence there that is kind of a lighter presence and allows me to just be generally more positive about my days.

**Tanya Wiser:** Beautiful. That seems beautiful. Thank you, Corey. Does anybody else want to share anything from the series that you've been doing that you found beneficial? 

Part of the reason I ask about noticing joy is that the negativity bias is so strong. I find that people just pass over those practices quickly. The mind loses interest so fast. With well-being, it's like if you imagine doing the raft practice, everybody is done before they even get to the part where you sit around the table. There's just this tendency to skip it. But we could actually stay with it. We could spend some more time and ask, "What were the conditions that supported this joy? Well, I was at the sangha[^1], I had good intentions." There are various things that we could start to really highlight for ourselves.

It's a mystery for me, and I'm wanting to arouse interest in this and help people sustain it. I think it's so important, which is why I'm lingering here. I really want to encourage you to think about how to help the mind take in the good, because it won't do it by itself until we condition it in that direction.

I also want to invite all of you to a day-long meditation retreat this Saturday from 9:30 to 4:30. There are flyers at the edge of the stage if you want to pick one up. You're welcome to come for the whole time, and if you can't stay all day, it's fine to come for a part of it. I'll be co-teaching with Kodo. If you did the intro series with us, he'll be back and co-teaching with me for that day-long.

## Wise Effort

To start tonight, I have a little bit of a quote:

> Practice sometimes unfolds in surprising ways. It's actually never a straight line to any fixed goal. Just like life is always a mixture of things that arise, from times characterized by confusion, doubt, and discouragement to times of clarity, joy, and inspiration. Keep practicing. Just keep practicing. Never stop practicing.

So, it's not a straight line. I've had this image of myself at times where it feels like with almost every step you could go this way or that way off the path. Sometimes it's just this constant attention to what's happening to keep us on the path. We wander off, and we have to come back. But if we're really right here, you can start to even see, "Oh, the mind is entertaining the compulsions and the pulls."

For me, one of the really supportive things to pay attention to in my practice is my effort. There's so much there; it's so dynamic working with effort. It's no different from opening a jar. Different jars are easier, some are harder. If you don't put in enough effort, the jar doesn't open. If you put in too much effort, you might break the jar. The feedback is right there: the lid comes off or it doesn't. That's a very gross analogy, but the truth is that there's so much effort in deciding to do something, and how much effort we put into it can really impact our experience. The practice is no different. In fact, it's a beautiful thing to start to notice and think about: "How much effort am I putting into being aware of my breathing?"

That will change over the course of a practice period. In five minutes, the amount of effort needed to stay with the breath can change dramatically. Typically, if we start the practice with a little more effort to stay with the breath, it helps us get established with that anchor. But if we keep putting in that much effort after a while, it becomes too much. We start to overwork and overstrain, and we start to get tight. So, there's a certain amount of effort needed to get started, and then we need to back off. Sometimes we'll back off a little too much, and we'll start to wander and lose our focus. Then we need to notice that and bring back a little bit more effort.

The practice we're doing is an effort itself. Choosing the right anchor is an effort. Doing loving-kindness practice is a certain kind of effort. Even the mindset or the tone of voice in the mind is part of what affects the effort.

I'm going to invite you all to just close your eyes for a second. In silence, in your own mind, I'd like you to say your own name. Just say it a few times and see if you can notice how it feels and what you notice in your body when you hear your own name.

Okay, now I'd like you to think about somebody who adores you. It could be a pet, child, grandparent, somebody alive, or somebody from the past. It doesn't matter, just somebody that you know is pretty smitten with you. I'd like you to imagine hearing your name in their voice just a few times. Notice what that feels like in your body.

Okay, could you feel the difference inside of yourself? I see some slight nods. This is a great example of the subtleties that we can start to pay attention to with effort. These are ways we can start to tune into how we're bringing ourselves to the cushion. If we aren't careful, we can bring the voice of an irritated parent to the experience of sitting. Our system will respond to that way of being spoken to.

When we talk about effort in the practice, we often use two words: *skillful* and *unskillful*. These describe how habits, thoughts, decisions, and practices lead to suffering or the end of suffering. With these terms, we are tuning into how effort supports our ability to be present. We need to see ourselves as our instrument. The tone of voice, the amount that we're encouraging ourselves—we're like a bell that will resonate and have different tonal impacts. We want to look for things that are skillful, meaning they support our awareness, wisdom, and mindfulness being present.

We use our effort as we grow this practice to monitor our inner life. Earlier, Joe was talking to me about monitoring how she's thinking in daily life, and this is wise effort. But if we're in the middle of life trying to work or talk to somebody, and we're over-efforting, we can't keep functioning because we're overanalyzing ourselves. We use effort to monitor and check in on our intentions. I like to talk about feedback. It's the resonance, the impact of what we're doing. What is the feedback that we're getting from our effort? Are we not just doing something, but actually paying attention to the impact of what we're doing?

There is a teaching on four kinds of effort[^2]. Essentially, there are two parts: one has to do with preventing or stopping unwholesome or unskillful experiences, and the other is to grow or sustain the skillful. If we're noticing a lot of hatred or self-hatred come up, we can try to stop the hatred, and once it is stopped, we want to prevent it from arising again. Alternatively, we can turn away from the hatred and grow something that's wholesome, like love, kindness, or compassion, and then sustain it. We don't always have to focus on stopping something unskillful; we can instead choose to grow something skillful and essentially abandon the unskillful.

Sometimes it works to just be like, "No, that doesn't feel good. I'm done," and there's just a stopping that happens. It's really simple and clear. But sometimes I find that when there's something I'm doing that is a problem for me, I can actually reinforce it if I stay focused on it and start criticizing myself for doing it.

If I'm practicing loving-kindness and sustaining a skillful mind state, I might start to get interested in my phone. That's not skillful; it's not going to support the cultivation of loving-kindness. That might be something I truly want to stop. If my phone is within reach, I might literally want to turn it off or put it away. If I can do something that simple, it might be very easy to stop while I'm working on sustaining something supportive.

Trying to get the mind more interested in what is happening is wise effort. Helping us be curious and interested is wise effort. Having a mind that's really interested is helpful—like a kid who is curious about what happens if they put two more drops of dye into a solution. That kind of mindset where we really want to stay with it and find it fascinating is beneficial. Now, too much of that is not good either.

I think a lot of times, it's almost similar to noticing joy: we're much more interested in the creation of the effort and the *doing* than in caring about what happens. Our pattern is to pay attention to the launching, and not what it's really like to ride in the boat. We get in trouble with ourselves in our practice and in relationships because of this. Tuning in to the resonance and feeling into the space between yourself and others is really powerful and important.

Another thing that can happen is that we can have a sense of wanting to avoid something. We say or do something, and think, "Oh, I hope that didn't come out the wrong way." We don't want to cause difficulty, and then there's a tendency to turn away, deny, and move on so that we don't have to pause and take in the impact of what happened. We're conditioned not to stay tuned in to the impact of what we're doing because we think it's not important, or we feel embarrassed and don't want to cause more of a mess. It doesn't always mean we have to say something, but it is important to pay attention, even if it's just within ourselves, to give it some space. We don't always know how we're impacting other people, but we can notice how we're being impacted. Maybe it's like, "Now I'm worried that what I said wasn't okay, but they seem fine. Why am I worried?" There's something there for us to see.

## Reflections on Effort

I'm wondering what thoughts, associations, or ideas you might be having about effort in your practice, and what you're noticing. Is anybody open to sharing?

**Myla:** The effort part I find really interesting because when I meditate, sometimes I'm really there and giving it an even amount of effort. Other times, a whole half hour goes by and I don't really know what I was doing. Why am I sitting for a half hour if I'm not going to actually meditate and focus on that anchor? Also, when you were talking about voices, sometimes I have thoughts that obviously aren't necessarily in line with who I want to be. I've heard over and over again to become friendly with it, rather than just choosing the wise versus the unwise. Just today it was like, "Oh yeah, I hear you." Just acknowledging it because it's coming from somewhere.

**Tanya Wiser:** Absolutely. Myla, sometimes that is the most skillful thing we can do. It dissipates everything to not give it much attention.

**Myla:** Yeah, I mean I could go on and on and say, "Oh, that again," but instead it's like, "Yeah, hey, I hear you." Give it some kindness or love.

**Tanya Wiser:** Yeah, and sometimes we'll play with it, because the response is what's going to tell us what's next. Sometimes you'll find it grows because there's something that wants attention, and we might have to respond in a different way. Sometimes it's just going to dissipate. This is the thing to pay attention to: what is the impact of our effort? What happens? Does anybody else have an idea about effort?

**Rose:** Sometimes I feel I could be a bit overconfident in what I'm doing, and then all of a sudden 30 minutes goes by and I'm like, "Wait, what was I doing? I'm not even really focused." Maybe I thought my anchor was on the breath, and then I stopped paying attention to it. Then the following day at work, I'm all fired up and writing referrals left and right, and I'm just like, "Why can't I be okay with this? I thought I was on track with my meditation." I guess maybe the voice that I was listening to was laced in criticism rather than loving-kindness.

**Tanya Wiser:** That's beautiful. I'll tell another little story. One place I've been watching the impact of effort is swimming. When you swim, trying to speed up is very different from pushing something on land, because the consistency of the water is different. There is a concerted amount of effort when I'm trying to increase my pace. I love the water, the light, the feeling of being in it, and the smoothness. But when I'm putting in a lot of effort, it's like a hood comes down over my head, and I stop seeing all these things. I stop feeling the joy of swimming. So there's this real balancing act of needing to work harder while trying to open up at the same time.

I share that as an example of how we need to be mindful of our effort. When we're trying hard, it can literally feel like pulling a hood down over our heads. I've felt like that has happened to me in meditation too. All I'm doing is focusing on trying so hard that I'm not paying attention to much of anything else. As we start to watch this, we might have a relationship with a certain feeling in our body that tells us when we're trying too hard or putting in too much effort, and conversely, when we're not putting in enough.

**Brian:** The metaphor I've heard before with one's practice is tuning a guitar string[^3]. If it's too loose, the note is sour. If it's too taut, the string can break. You want it in tune, where it's humming along.

**Tanya Wiser:** Absolutely. There's a sutta all about this. If the string is too tight, it doesn't vibrate right. It's like trying to ring a bell while holding it tightly; it blocks the sound from vibrating. If there's too much slack, you get no sound. This is a very beautiful simile for helping us think about the effort that we're putting in. We're the instrument we're playing, and we've got to tune in to the impact of what we're doing.

**Rose:** How do you know when you're too taut or too slack? I know there's tension. And maybe apathy if I'm feeling like, "Whatever, it doesn't matter, I'll just try to move on."

**Tanya Wiser:** Absolutely. Watching subtle body tension is one way. You might find yourself completely slumping or losing a sense of uprightness. Our bodies are all going to look a little different, so we'll know our own selves. But tension—like your shoulders are tense, or your jaws are gripping. My shoulders will come up to my ears, or my eyebrows will get super tight when I'm trying to concentrate. This is all feedback that I'm over-efforting. We have our own conditioning and body patterns that will give us feedback about over or under-efforting. The tone of voice in our minds, the word choices, the rapidity of the speaking in our heads—these are all forms of feedback.

## Tips for Practice

In general, relaxation is actually really important. We start sitting up and finding a good posture. We set an intention and work to establish our connection with the anchor. It's like they say: the bones are upright, and then let the muscles fall off the bones. Let the belly hang out. There's this combination of being upright and relaxed.

For me, another big thing is paying attention to my chest. It's important for me to squeeze my elbows together, lift my shoulders up and back, because this counters the leaning forward with computers and phones. Then the body can breathe more easily. Setting ourselves up physically before we come in helps us relax.

Trying to get interested is wise effort. Curiosity is very helpful. Saying, "I'm interested in learning about what's happening here. I'm interested in noticing what happens if I start my practice this way versus that way." Another word for relaxation might be receptivity. If we're too braced and use too much effort, there's no receptivity. Practice requires a lot of attunement and willingness to be receptive.

When thinking becomes really strong, one of the things that we teach is to notice the *way* you're thinking instead of staying focused on the content of the thought. Notice if you are thinking in words, thinking in typed-out words, hearing, or thinking in images and memories. Notice if it's in color or black and white. Another way is to grossly categorize the type of thinking: worrying, planning, wanting, remembering. These simple categories help us shift from the content. When we stay with the content, we get grabbed and pulled into the movie more easily.

Another example of a really skillful practice when there's a lot going on in our minds is doing loving-kindness practice. You can offer phrases to yourself, to somebody else, or to all beings. It's essentially four phrases: "May I be safe. May I be happy. May I be healthy. May I be at ease." We just gently repeat these phrases over and over in the mind, and that can help settle things. It's that effort of arousing good, skillful states in the mind and sustaining them.

## Small Group Exercise Reflections

*(The group breaks into smaller circles to ask each other the recurring prompt: "If I keep practicing, no matter what...")*

**Tanya Wiser:** Did everybody get a chance? Thank your sangha members for their openness and attention. For the recording, the question was, "If I keep practicing, no matter what..." Over and over again, we asked the same question to see what different answers came up. I'm curious if anyone wants to share what they learned.

**Joe:** It wasn't so much what I was thinking. It was after it was my turn, I looked back and thought, "Oh, my life is hanging by my meditation practice. I feel that my life is going to miraculously change if I stay on this path." So I was blurting out all these positives, and then as I sat back, I'm like, "Well, what if it doesn't happen?"

**Tanya Wiser:** Yes. And then, you know, what happens when it doesn't happen exactly that way? And you keep practicing. It won't go exactly the way you think it will. Nothing does; life is too unpredictable. Did anybody else want to share? I overheard a few nice things that were very inspiring.

**Ben:** Of all the things that we said, one was just like living a life fully awake as opposed to half asleep.

**Mitra:** We all said really good things will happen if we keep practicing, so I think there's no reason not to practice. And I think a little bit of those things are already happening. Just a tiny, tiny bit of kindness that nobody else would realize, but I do.

**Tanya Wiser:** Beautiful. Anyone else want to share anything that they were a little bit surprised by?

**Student:** I was driving across the Bay Bridge this morning, and it was very crowded. Normally, say ten years ago, I would be zipping in and out of that traffic, trying to take out any little space in that road. Maybe I'd get there five minutes faster, maybe not. But I just sat there and thought, "Imagine these are all your brothers and sisters on this road." That's all they are.

## Guided Meditation

We're starting with the effort of finding our bodies in this present moment. Move around a little bit, adjust your posture, see if you need to stretch. Invite your awareness to come inward.

Start to feel the support of the cushion or the chair, the floor. Feel yourself giving your weight to your bones. See if the breath doesn't rise up right in the middle of it.

We talk about finding an anchor that helps us stay here. Most frequently we use the breath, but you can choose a different anchor—sound, sensation. Take a moment to be curious and interested about how you're experiencing your anchor at this moment, in this body, at this time.

If you're having a bit of a challenge connecting with your anchor, you might try taking three longer, slower, deep breaths. Invite relaxation and a letting go with the exhale.

Remember the sound of the voice that you chose for hearing your name earlier—the one that says it with care, acceptance, and kindness. See if you can find that voice in your mind and your body. Whether it's in your own voice or in theirs, offer the phrases to yourself with that energy, that heart.

Remember that this practice of loving-kindness is a practice where we are not trying to make something happen. Rather, it's all said with this "May I," "May you," or "May we." It's almost like an invitation that we're dropping into our own system, to the universe. We'll do that with that voice of kindness and care.

You can start with offering it to yourself. If you find that it's really uncomfortable, then bring to mind somebody who's so easy to love, and imagine them there in front of you. You can offer the phrases to them. We're starting where it's easiest for us. This is an example of effort, and then paying attention to the impact of our effort. If we offer to ourselves and we notice resistance and difficulty, we're noticing and receiving the impact of our practice, and then maybe shifting to an easier being for ourselves tonight.

The phrases start:

*May I be safe.* Just taking a moment to hold that idea of safety, safeness, safe enough. Maybe noticing in this present moment if there's a sense of safeness. How do we know when we're feeling a sense of safeness? What happens in our bodies when we feel safe enough? May I be safe.

*May I be happy.* This is that happiness that's not dependent on other things, a simple happiness. Just a sense of ease or joy that's so subtle sometimes. Maybe bringing to mind an experience of feeling just a contented, peaceful happiness. May I be happy.

*May I be healthy.* As healthy as I can be. Connecting with that feeling of health and vitality, well-being. May I experience well-being. May I be healthy.

*May I be at ease.* And what does ease feel like? May I be at ease.

Now we'll repeat the phrases, and you can take a moment to decide if you want to continue to offer the phrases to yourself, or maybe to another human being you know that could use some support, someone who is having a hard time. Maybe somebody who's easy to love, a pet, maybe all beings in the world. I'll use the word "we" for whatever "we" is in you.

*May we be safe.*
*May we be happy.*
*May we be healthy.*
*May we be at ease.*

*May all beings everywhere without exception be safe, be happy, be healthy, and be at ease.*

## Closing Reflections

We have a few minutes left, and I thought we could pass the microphone so you can say whatever you want to say as we wrap up this four-week series. What do you want to give to the sangha, or to yourself?

**Sage:** I think what I'd like to give is just gratitude. Gratitude to Tanya, and gratitude to all of you. It's been wonderful practicing together. Thank you so much for teaching. I hope to apply it and to get to "if you keep practicing without exception" someday soon.

**Ben:** I've attended many different classes over the years, and the effect of each class is very subtle. You wonder, "Well, what did I learn?" Then, as you live your normal life, you begin to see snippets and bits and pieces which make you hopeful that maybe I did learn something.

**Mitra:** I feel the same. It's subtle, but it's adding up. I want to thank you for these four weeks. Something happened today when you said to hear the voice of a person. Something in my heart changed. I don't think I've ever heard my own name like this before. I heard it in my dad's voice, and it changed everything about how I feel about the whole world. Today is four years since he passed away. Hearing his voice... thank you.

**Student:** Thank you, Tanya, and thank you everyone for allowing me to feel safe and welcome. I'm just grateful for the two months that I've been cultivating this practice, and I just hope to continue on this journey. Even though there can be times of such self-doubt, I have to remind myself that patience is something that I have to practice. Just sitting and being with the breath, and not allowing myself to be completely carried out like a boat in the water. I can drop the anchor. Sometimes I'm holding it, and I'd rather be swept away by everything, but I know there's a better way to live life. I'm so grateful to everyone, and I'm excited for next week.

**Rose:** I would like to thank you for teaching and sharing the knowledge. It's pretty useful; there's a lot to learn and a lot to apply. As was said, patience is needed to absorb everything and to apply everything. Thanks again for sharing, and thanks to the other participants.

**Participant:** Thank you for everything. The inner voice is something that I picked up this time. I'm learning that it could use some softening. The distinction between calling your own name and imagining somebody that likes you saying your name helped me realize that. I think that pervades a lot of my being in the world. It's a really important focal point to study. I guess you start with accepting and move on. Noticing is where I'm at right now.

**Corey:** I didn't know what to expect, and I knew I was coming on the last night. Thank you all for accepting me tonight. I got the feeling that there was a real sweetness here, and a nice sangha. I benefited by it tonight. I'm looking forward to the all-day retreat on Saturday. Thank you for sharing so deeply tonight. I feel like there's a common thread in why we end up in meditation and what we want in life as human beings, so it was great to share that with you all.

**Richelle:** Hey everyone, I'm Richelle. Thank you, Tanya, for teaching the class, and thank you to the community. It was very nice getting to know everyone and hearing your thoughts as well. I think for me, the series has been sometimes challenging, but also it has been very useful in advancing my meditation practice. Certainly, I'm more observant of many of the tools and states of mind that we discussed here, like the inner voice, the different types of resistance that we experience in trying to be mindful, and a lot of subconscious conditioning that pretty much affects everything. It's been very good to expand my practice. Thank you.

**Student:** This is my first time doing this in a group setting. I like it because when I'm here, there's nowhere else I need to be. There's not much else of a distraction. Even just listening to the teaching, sometimes I catch myself wandering and it's like, "Okay, wait, you're here, get back to it." I want to get more into the practice of just being present, so this has been a good start for me.

**Joe:** Hi, I'm Joe. I am just so glad that I found my way back here. I first came here in 2015, and I don't know what happened, but I just looked into it a couple of weeks ago. I love Tanya, I think you're a fantastic teacher, and I feel very welcomed by everyone. I love my new Thursday evenings. Thank you.

**Tanya Wiser:** Wow. Well, may the benefit that you all shared come in deep, and may you appreciate and savor that benefit and share it. It's just going to be shared in so many ways. If you hold it dear, you can't help but share it. May that continue to be shared with all beings, so that everywhere on this planet, people experience the benefit of this practice. I appreciate your sincerity and your engagement. This is a beautiful sangha. Thank you for being here.

---

[^1]: **Sangha:** A Pali word meaning "community." In Buddhism, it typically refers to the monastic community or the wider community of practitioners.
[^2]: **Four Right Exertions** (or Four Great Efforts): The Buddhist teaching on effort, involving four practices: preventing unarisen unwholesome states, abandoning arisen unwholesome states, arousing unarisen wholesome states, and maintaining arisen wholesome states.
[^3]: **Sona Sutta:** A teaching in which the Buddha uses the simile of a stringed instrument (the lute or vina) to explain the necessity of balancing energy and effort in practice to a monk named Sona.