--- ai_generation_date: '2026-07-07' ai_model: gemini-3-pro-preview audiodharma: talks: - date: '2022-01-14' mp3_url: https://audiodharma.us-east-1.linodeobjects.com/talks/14856/20220114-Nikki_Mirghafori-IMC-happy_hour_i_am_here_now_--_for_a_limited_time.mp3 speakers: - speaker_name: Nikki Mirghafori speaker_url: https://www.audiodharma.org/speakers/229 talk_start_time_seconds: 0 title: 'Happy Hour: I Am Here, Now -- For A Limited Time' url: https://www.audiodharma.org/talks/14856 video_unavailable: false location_city: Redwood City, CA video_unavailable: false youtube: id: b0bKW7pbt6k imprecise_upload_date: '2022-05-04' title: 'Happy Hour: I Am Here, Now -- For A Limited Time' upload_date: null uploader_str: Insight Meditation Center uploader_url: https://www.youtube.com/@InsightMeditationCenter youtube_url: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b0bKW7pbt6k --- # Happy Hour: I Am Here, Now -- For A Limited Time - [Nikki Mirghafori](https://www.audiodharma.org/speakers/229) *This is an AI-generated transcript from auto-generated subtitles for the video above. It likely contains inaccuracies, especially with speaker attribution if there are multiple speakers.* ## [Happy Hour: I Am Here, Now -- For A Limited Time](https://www.audiodharma.org/talks/14856) ### Introduction Hello and welcome again to Happy Hour. It is wonderful to be with you and practicing together. For today's practice, there are two themes I would like to bring in and invite us to work with. One is that it's Friday, the end of the week, and also for some, it's Saturday. I acknowledge those joining from different time zones, but it is the end of the week. This is a way of bringing in some silence, quiet, rest, and nourishment. That theme can really go together with another theme I've been sitting with and exploring. Some of you know I'm teaching a course starting in less than two weeks called *Befriending Mortality*. This perspective of the arc of our life is a theme we worked with last week as well, which is world mettā[^1] from the perspective of looking at our lives. For this being who is us, who has done their best, hopefully with no regrets at that point—maybe there are some—but a sense of mettā, love, and acceptance of all there is. The goodness, the challenges, the regrets, the difficulty, just a sense of complete acceptance and love. It is as if our inner Buddha, our inner compassion itself is getting supercharged and taking on that perspective of looking at our lives with a sense of freedom, peace, letting go, ultimate love, and complete acceptance for ourselves. For all the mistakes we made, all the shortcomings, all the quirks we had, and all the goodness we brought, as well as all the interactions. That is the theme for our practice tonight. In terms of our practice in this moment, let's stay with the sense of mettā from this perspective. Whether you're new to Happy Hour or experienced, whatever you need to know for this guided meditation, I will share with you. Relax, let go, enjoy the ride, and whatever arises, it's the right thing that needs to arise. If sadness or grief arises, if joy arises, if freedom arises—whatever arises, trust that that's the right thing that needs to arise right now. As long as you hold it with compassion and love, it's okay. As long as you don't push it away as a mistake, as long as you love it, you may not like it, but as long as you love it, you're doing the practice perfectly right. There's no wrong here. ### Guided Meditation With those invitations, I'd like to invite you to settle in your body. Arrive here in this moment. This life. This being here. This body. Landing in this body, as always, we arrive, we connect with ourselves. Letting the body be seated or lying down. [Music] Feeling your feet on the floor, grounded, rooted to the earth. Your sit bones hugging the earth, landing on the cushion. Your hands relaxed, soft, spread on your lap or touching each other. Your neck and shoulders, letting go of any tightness or tension. Noticing this breath. This amazing, lovely breath. Morning breeze. Fresh with possibility. Giving life. Moving through your body, through your lungs, in the lower abdomen. This letting go, this moment, releasing. Of course, there are thoughts, memories, plans, agitations. It's okay. That's what this mind does. No judgment. Releasing. Here. So delicious just to be here. Taking a moment of refuge, quiet, silence on this Friday, Saturday, whatever moment in time. This precious moment in time has never been and will never repeat. I am here. I am. I am here. So simple, yet so profound. I am. I am here. I am here, now. This may not always be true, but it is in this moment. I am here now. I am here. I am here now. In this moment. This will not always be true, but at this moment, I am. Can I deeply connect and appreciate with gratitude, taking refuge in just presence? The magnificence, the mystery of presence. I am here right now. I am. Thoughts arise, planning. Let that go, release. Just be here, simple. I am in this moment. Not complicated. Not "what if," not "what about," just I am. Simple. See the magnificence and the simplicity of not thinking, just being, connecting with "I am here." Really incredible to just be. To exist, to be conscious and aware. I am. Not "I am sad," "I am good," "I am bad," "I am worthy." Just "I am." The amazingness of "I am here now." Now I'd like to invite us, from this perspective, connecting with the amazingness of just being here now, existing at this moment: what if this were the last moment of our lives? Taking the perspective of this precious, beautiful, amazing being who did their best. Letting there be a sense of love, tenderness, even heartbreak for this being who was you, is you. Without any judgment. From the perspective of your inner Buddha nature, your inner Buddha, your inner Kwan Yin[^2], just loving. This being walked this earth. At times jumped with joy, with love, with care. Sometimes crawled with sadness, with pain. Sometimes was alone and lonely. Sometimes was interconnected with loved ones, friends, family. Was touched and touched many lives. Of course, every one of us has. Loving this being who is me. Unconditionally. With as much forgiveness as possible. They did their best. If they could have done better given all the causes and conditions, they would have. Can we just open up to love? From the perspective of a compassionate inner Buddha, in your divinity, just love. Just held in love. And if there are areas in life that perhaps call for more love, more care, more forgiveness, see what's needed right now, both for yourself and other beings you are entangled with. You can also choose a time when this being who is you had a vulnerable time, a challenging time, and just love. I just love this being. Recognize the courage, the goodness of having hung in there. Recognizing the goodness, the beauty, and offering love. Now acknowledging that you are here. I am here. This has not been the last moment of your life. The time will come, it will for all of us humans, it's inevitable. And yet you are here. You have time to love, to forgive yourself and others, to love yourself and others. See what kind of energy that might bring into your practice. I can love. I can forgive. I have a chance. I have time. Limited, but it's still possible. How do I want to love myself and others? To show up, my heart and my mind. Time is short. Time is short. There's only one of you in the world there's ever been and will ever be. You're unique. This unique being, with its particularities, wants to express. It's amazing the potential to care, to love, and for wisdom. You still can. Time is short, and you have time. May all beings everywhere wake up, know their capacity, the magnificence of their goodness, their Buddha nature. May all beings, including ourselves, know how precious and limited our time, our precious human birth is, and may we use it wisely and compassionately. ### Reflections and Q&A Thank you, dear sangha[^3], for your practice, for showing up. Mark, I see your hand. Please share. **Mark:** Many times I'm completely out of sync with what you're talking about, and sometimes, like tonight, I'm totally in sync with it. Early this week I was watching a TV program and there was a song playing in the background for just a couple of minutes about a little girl in her made-up little world with a little house where she fed her guests bark and leaves. I was intrigued, so I looked up the song afterwards and found it on YouTube. I played about half a dozen versions of it, went to bed, and woke up the next morning feeling that I had lived. I was satisfied with my life. I had done all that I needed to do. I was ready if I died this afternoon, that was absolutely fine. There was no problem. I certainly had made loads of mistakes and it wasn't perfect, but I was happy with this life. It was enough, I was satisfied, and I was ready to go. [Music] **Nikki Mirghafori:** Thank you, Mark. Thank you so much for sharing that beautiful reflection, part of your practice. Thank you for the benefit of all sangha beings. Please do share the song in the chat, and also in the Google groups if you like. Claire, please. **Claire:** Thank you, Nikki. I raised my hand because this is such a beautiful coincidence. I was on the phone about two hours ago with a friend who had had a serious accident. We were talking about her medical needs, and somehow we got onto the subject of death and how seriously she had injured herself. I shared with her that I have had a near-death experience, and it changed me forever in terms of the way I live my life, the way I see myself, and the gratitude I feel for having had the life that I've had. As I lay on the stretcher, I thought, "It doesn't really matter now. I haven't done everything I wanted to do, I haven't done it all very well, but I've had a chance and I've tried hard, and I will always be grateful." I'm no longer afraid of death because I was able to look at it and say, "It's okay, whatever happens is just fine with me." So there you go. **Nikki Mirghafori:** Thank you, Claire. Thank you also for sharing your sense of ease and freedom with the inevitable. It's just part of life, death. And the profound shift that your near-death experience has had. In fact, I was looking at some studies on post-traumatic growth. One thing that happens after such traumatic experiences is one's priorities shift, the way one shows up. One actually lives more fully and more completely. There's a lot of research on post-traumatic growth. Thank you, Claire, for sharing your insights and your firsthand experience. Any other reflections you can share? You can share your reflections privately with me, and I won't read your name. If they're to everyone, I'll read your reflection and your name. There was a question about the course that I had mentioned, *Befriending Mortality*. One person asked if they have too many work conflicts on Wednesdays for the four-week course starting January 26th, whether it's possible or appropriate to sign up and listen to the sessions after they're recorded. That is okay. We're allowing that option because it's not just listening to the recordings; there are also homeworks, reflections, and participation with the sangha online through writings and sharing. You're more than welcome to participate, even if it's not possible to be in all of the live sessions in real time. Jerry says, "Sometimes ego gets in the way of accepting death, and then one gets lost." Absolutely, of course, that is so natural and normal. If it were easy, it wouldn't be a practice; we would all just have it perfectly. There is so much about ego, it's so hard for the ego to contemplate its own demise—hence terror management theory in psychology. There's so much I can say about this, but I'll save all of that for the course. Are there any other reflections from the meditation tonight before we turn to small groups? One private share: "Very powerful Happy Hour. Thank you sangha, and thank you to you." Thank you for your practice. Yes, it was a powerful one for me also. There were so many different aspects to the guidance tonight, especially at the end when I invited you to realize, "Oh, I still have time. I still can show up with love, with forgiveness." For me, I felt this burst of energy, determination, gumption, brightness. Like, yes, I'm still here. I won't always be, and yet, what precious agency, how precious. So, dear ones, how about we turn our attention at this point to practicing in small groups, in sizes of roughly three. The invitation is to start with about 15 seconds of silence, and then acknowledge: here we are, these beautiful, amazing, impermanent beings. Whatever you'd like to share to support others' practice and your own practice, as little or as much as you'd like to share, you are welcome. Be kind to yourself, be kind to each other. This is where the practice really hits the road, in these small groups. I'm going to open the rooms, take care of yourselves, take care of each other. *(Small group breakout sessions)* Welcome back everyone. The rooms are closed. We have a couple of minutes for any reflections that might have come up from the practice, from speaking with each other, that can be of benefit to yourself to be held witness, or for the sangha. Any questions, confusions, aha moments—it's all good. This is your sangha, what would be helpful to bring up to share? Greg, please. **Greg:** I was just sharing with the other folks that I had the curious experience of finding myself in an ER, trying to sort of get up, and then being told by the attending physicians that they may not be able to save me. They said, "Don't move, don't be a young buck, we don't know if you're going to survive, so don't try and make any movement at all." It was just curious how absolutely average it felt. No trumpets were playing, no angels descended, there was just this sort of averageness of this existence. I have to say, it inspired a real curiosity about whether that was a normal, average, or desirable reaction to the core existential challenge to me. **Nikki Mirghafori:** Thank you, thanks for bringing that up. I so appreciate how you are sitting with that, not taking it as good or bad, but as, "Oh, interesting, this is one experience that showed up out of so many different experiences that could have possibly showed up in that moment. Well, this is the one that showed up, and I'm curious." Feeling into that, what does that feel like? What does that say? Just exploring it a little more, and being curious for it to perhaps continue to open up. Thank you, Greg. Rachel, I see your hand. Please. **Rachel:** Hi Nikki, it's good to see you. I was in your Maraṇasati[^4] retreat a few years ago, and I just signed up for your course also, so I'm looking forward to that. I'm not sure if it's a question or just an observation, but you know how there's this concept of almost practicing for our death, in a sense? Where we're working with being comfortable in the moment and being able to tolerate uncertainty. Lately, I've been doing a lot of mettā practice, a lot towards myself and others. I've been thinking backwards in time, and I don't know if there's a parallel teaching in Buddhism that we're not just practicing for our death, but we can actually send mettā back to our younger selves. Because that's what I've started doing, and it seems like it's really helping. **Nikki Mirghafori:** Beautiful. That's great, keep doing that. What lights me up is when I hear, "I'm doing that, and it's helping. This is working." Yes, trust that. Even before I turn into the Buddhist scholar—you know, the Buddha said on his deathbed, which is a clear, important message about death: "Be a light unto yourself." What I'm hearing, Rachel, is that when you're a light unto yourself, you realize, "Yes, this is working, this is opening something up for my humanity, for my being, the way I'm loving and showing up." So absolutely, please keep practicing in this way. I could talk about other practices, but I think I'll just leave it at that. Keep doing it, this is great. Thanks so much for sharing that. We'll close with this last reflection in the chat from Soymin: "I was thinking about the experience of moments of fear. I've had the habit of being kind to others and ourselves. I feel it would help in being kind and calming ourselves in those moments." Yes, absolutely, very much so. Mettā is an antidote to fear, especially in those moments of challenge, being afraid, and being kind to ourselves and others. Another beautiful insight. Thank you all. Thank you for showing up. Thank you for your practice. Deep bows to each and every one of you for your beautiful practice. May all beings be free, including ourselves. [Music] Thank you. --- [^1]: **Mettā:** A Pali word often translated as "loving-kindness," "goodwill," or "benevolence." [^2]: Original transcript said "quantity", corrected to **Kwan Yin** (Guanyin) based on context, a Bodhisattva associated with compassion. [^3]: **Sangha:** The Buddhist community of monks, nuns, novices, and laity. [^4]: **Maraṇasati:** A Buddhist meditation practice of remembering or being mindful of death.