Happy Hour: Pre-Election Equanimity Practice

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The following talk was given by Nikki Mirghafori at Insight Meditation Center in Redwood City, CA on November 03, 2020. Please visit the website www.audiodharma.org for more information.

Happy Hour: Pre-Election Equanimity Practice

Introduction

Hello everyone, and welcome to Happy Hour! If you can hear me okay, please give me a thumbs up. All right, great, fantastic. We have a couple of minutes before we formally start at 6:00 PM Pacific, so let's say hellos. I'll start by saying I'm Nikki, and I'm in Mountain View, California. You can either type it in the chat or unmute yourself now and say hello and where you're joining from.

Hi Bill from Dallas, grateful to be here. Yes, grateful that you're here also. Hi Claire from New York. [Claire notes a minor issue logging in via the main Insight Meditation Center website]. I see it on my end, but I will double-check to make sure and debug this later. If other people are having the same problem too, thanks for the heads up, Claire.

Elizabeth from Vancouver, Canada shares: "Thinking about all of you. Sending much love for tomorrow. Feeling anxious inside too here, just a lot of love for you guys, we're all in it together."

Yes, thank you, Elizabeth. Thank you very much for your thoughts. I appreciate you joining from Canada, and I see other folks joining from Asia as well. We are an international crowd as always at Happy Hour. This is an interesting time on this planet right now, especially for this country where I am residing. I appreciate your thoughts.

Let's get formally started. To welcome you again heartfully, warmly to Happy Hour on the eve of the US elections, which seem to have many concerned—not just in the US but around the world. Concerned about many things: about the environment, about the state of many beings for the years to come.

Introduction to Equanimity

With all of that, the theme that I wanted to offer for tonight's meditation and our practice together is equanimity. Don't we need it this week?

Equanimity is always a wonderful practice. It is actually thought to be the crown jewel of Buddhist practice, and there are so many different ways equanimity could be seen and practiced with. It is part of many different lists. It's part of the Seven Factors of Awakening^[1], holding the honorable position of being the last. It also shows up on the stages of insight as a state towards awakening—equanimity towards all that arises and passes away.

It also shows up on the list of the four Brahmaviharas^[2]—the four heavenly abodes. Mettā^[3] being the first one, which is the practice we primarily invite during Happy Hour (goodwill, friendliness, kindness). Compassion being the second, vicarious joy being the third, and equanimity being the culmination. It holds the honorable position of being the last and holding them all.

As a formal practice within the Brahmaviharas, there is a particular way to engage with it, and I will invite that tonight. It is really important to consider that the practice of equanimity is not supposed to be aloofness. It's not supposed to be "not caring." Many times, people confuse it with what is called its "near enemy." The near enemy of this practice is something that masquerades as the practice. In this case, the near enemy is aloofness or not caring. It masquerades as equanimity, but it's not. It's an enemy, but it's so near to it we sometimes miss it and think, "Oh yeah, it's the real thing," but it's not.

What does equanimity feel like? A hint is that it's related to Mettā. It's related to loving-kindness, it's related to warmth, it's related to compassion, it's related to vicarious joy. All of these have a warmth to them. Compassion has a sense of warmth and care. Mettā has a sense of warmth and care. It's not, "Oh, I don't care, whatever, may you be well." There is a caring, a sense of presence.

So equanimity, even though there is a sense of calm, a sense of peace, a sense of equipoise of being with things just as they are, there is also a sense of warmth and care. Because if one didn't care, one would check out and turn one's attention away completely. But there is a sense of care in holding presence, and yet being unmoved and stable. There's a sense of stability, not being knocked over. That is the feeling of equanimity when it arises.

As always, we'll start the practice with settling in the body and settling with the breath, and then I'll have some invitations for us to invite this wider perspective of a bird's-eye view, which is another translation of the word Upekkhā^[4]. It's having a bigger perspective on what's going on.

There is so much going on right now in the world. We don't know what might happen. Nothing might happen, something might happen—we don't know. And yet, if we have one perspective to evoke, it is this bird's-eye view of not just planet Earth and beyond, but of historical time. Historically, for us as human beings, events of significant magnitude for nations and people have arisen and passed away. We are part of this ocean of humanity, holding witness in this arc of humanity taking shape, each of us playing our part, serving, and holding witness.

As Martin Luther King Jr. said, the arc of the moral universe bends towards justice—and I add, towards goodness and compassion. We are a part of these waves of the ocean. Acknowledging that the waves have come, many nations and many people have happened and will continue to happen. Can we hold witness with equanimity and peace to support ourselves? And through our own equanimity and calm, can we offer support to others? Instead of being the one that screams and runs around, can we be the one that offers a calming, peaceful energy and quality to others as a way of support?

Guided Meditation

With that, I'd like to invite us to get into our meditation posture. If you need to move, sit up straighter with more dignity in your body, or if you need to lie down, see what your body needs in this moment to sit with ease.

To land. To land in this body. To land in this breath. To arrive, letting go of all thoughts, all preoccupations that came before, and taking a moment of refuge for yourself as an act of courage and service to yourself and to the world. To let go of the worries and fears and turn inward to build a foundation of peace and equanimity.

Turning your gaze inward, inviting your body to relax, and then connecting with the breath in the abdomen. Each breath calming, soothing, settling. And each out-breath relaxing the body. Relaxing the eyes, the forehead. Relaxing the head, relaxing the jaw. Letting yourself feel more sensations in the face as it becomes relaxed, as if a block of ice is melting, the tension and tightness dripping away.

Inviting the neck and the shoulders to relax. To give their weight, offer it to the earth. The chest, the heart softening. The heart center softening. The upper back, the lower back freeing up tightness. The abdomen softening. With each breath, relaxing and receiving the breath gently.

Inviting your sit bones, your bottom, to land, to cushion. As if the weight of your upper body is a sled. Feeling the heaviness landing. You don't have to hold anything up. Relaxing the legs, upper legs, knees, lower legs, and feet. Into the next breath, also letting your hands feel heavy. Your arms, upper arms, and lower arms heavy. Entire body feeling heavy. Feeling the earth element in the body. Heaviness. A delicious heaviness of landing.

And also feeling lightness. Interestingly, at the same time, there's a sense of lightness, a buoyancy to the mind and heart while the body feels heavy. If you like, you can experiment with the buoyancy and lightness with the in-breath, and the heaviness and landing with the out-breath. Landing more deeply.

Letting each breath be soothing, nourishing. The body heavy and relaxed, the mind resting happily right here, right now, with the breath in the body. Taking refuge, knowing that it's sweet to just be here. And if it runs away to a thought or a plan, come back, sweetie, come back. Let's take a moment of refuge, darling. Being kind to yourself, to your mind.

The awareness, loving awareness, deliberately connecting and receiving each breath. Connecting to the in-breath throughout the in-breath. Connecting to the out-breath throughout the out-breath in the abdomen. Calming, soothing.

Now I would like to invite you, if you wish, while feeling your body, feeling your breath in the abdomen—staying in the body, that's important throughout this practice. At any point, if you feel any anxiety or anything else arising, come back to the body. Come back to the breath, that's number one.

Feeling the body connected to the cushion, to the chair. Connected to the earth through your feet, your legs. Feeling the breath moving through, calming, soothing this moment. This moment just as it is, miraculous. It has never been this way and will never be again. In this body, this exact moment will never be experienced in this consciousness again. You are privileged, you are graced with this knowing. Appreciating just this sweet knowing of whatever is revealing itself to you in your body right now.

Sweet knowing. It's like this. It's like this right now. And if there are tightnesses or pains revealing themselves to you, let there be a sense of spaciousness to hold them, to allow for this too. This tightness, this pain, this challenge in the body—this too. You don't need to be toppled over. There can be enough spaciousness in the heart and the mind this moment—so much more than you give yourself credit for—to include this too, this pain, this challenge. Expansively breathing with it, breathing around it, including it. It doesn't have to be any other way because guess what? It's like this right now.

Given all the causes and conditions, so many causes and conditions set in motion a long time ago, it's like this. It has to be like this. If it could have been any other way, it would have been. So, make space for this body, this breath, just as it is in this moment. Breathing, receiving, not trying to make it different or go away or suppress it. Expansively letting it be just as it is, whatever it is in the body, whatever is arising in your environment.

Trusting there is enough spaciousness in your heart, in your mind, far beyond what you give yourself credit for. A sense of stability, expansiveness, just being with what is. The felt sense of experience right now. This body, sounds arising and passing. The heart as wide as the world, and calm, settled in the body. Unmoved, unshaken by the sensations, by the sounds in this moment.

And feeling embodied, I'd like to invite you—as if you were a bird, still feeling your body—flying up, up, up. As if you were sitting on top of a mountain or in the clouds, and watching not just planet Earth, and not just the universe, the stars, other galaxies which we are a tiny portion of. As if this little bird is both looking down on planet Earth and up at the skies, stars, Milky Way, other galaxies with awe and wonder. Of expansiveness, so expansive. The heart of this little birdie that's you feeling the expansion of the mystery. The mystery that is this existence, that is this universe, the stars, that is this body, this consciousness, this existence.

And now, not just looking at the Earth and the skies and the body, but also as if you were looking through time. Backwards in time, forwards in time, not just this moment. And also, as if you had a special vision, you could see all the threads of conditionality. All the causes and conditions: this leading to that, that leading to this. All these humans, all these beings, animals, things that happened on the Earth way before you were born. Things that happened a long time ago that have led to this moment in time with all the interbeing. Humans, animals, planet Earth, the universe, the things that we cannot see. In Buddhism, the seen and the unseen.

Breathing, feeling this magnificent body breathing, this miracle that is the body breathing. And sensing all this amazing universe. The sense of awe and perspective that is wider. Expansive, infinite almost.

If you wish, you can just be silent. Or if you wish, you can silently recite to yourself an equanimity practice phrase:

May I be at peace with the comings and goings, the arisings and passings away of things.

Breathing, letting your heart be expansive, spacious.

May I have peace with the comings and goings.

Just breathing.

May I have peace. May there be spacious equanimity in my heart and mind. The unfolding of this miraculous universe, events, with stability and spaciousness to be of support to myself, to others, and the whole world.

May I have peace with all the beginnings and endings, the unfolding of life, internally and externally.

Small Groups and Self-Care

Thank you all for your practice.

Practice this evening in small groups is particularly special, so please don't jump off. Let me explain what we're going to do tonight. The invitation today, as we sit with the image of the stars—each star or each bird that you are, with other stars in the universe sitting together—is to share in the small groups one thing you are doing right now to take care of yourself. What are you doing to take care of your own heart, your own mind, your own body? Because the act of taking care of ourselves for stability and calm spaciousness is a radical act of service, not just to ourselves but to the world. It is not selfish at all.

So, each person will offer one short nugget, just one idea, not a long monologue. Then the next person, and the next person. It is a spiral format, so you'll go around and around. Maybe something someone said will inspire you to say something else. Keep going around until we have time. I trust this will be inspiring.

One thing that I did: I just came out of an online seven-day retreat yesterday, which was lovely to not listen to the news for seven days and just meditate. And I'm reminded to let you know that Diana and I are teaching a Mettā and Equanimity retreat starting Thursday afternoon, through Friday and Saturday, ending on Sunday. If you would like some support to meditate away from the craziness of the news, please sign up. Information is on insightretreatcenter.org. It says the retreat is full, but get on the waitlist and you'll be admitted as an auditor, which is very similar to a full retreat.

I am going to create the rooms, and I hope you stay and share your wisdom and what you're doing with others. But if for whatever reason you cannot stay, it's perfectly understandable.

Reflections and Closing

Welcome back, everyone. I would love to hear your reflections. You can either type them in chat or raise your blue hand. I'll share what's coming up for me: there is more of a sense of stability and spaciousness than there was before we sat. A sense of gladness, joy, and presence.

Bill offers: "Thank you for mentioning physical pain. Dealing with a bit of that right now." Thank you for sharing that, Bill. I think it's important to start internally before we go externally.

Jerry shares: "It was very helpful about the comings and goings of humans on the planet and, of course, geopolitical events. It was helpful to sort of put one in that place of—we're on the planet now and there'll be others later. Sitting in that moment, it stopped the busyness in my mind about what I need to do next." Thank you, Jerry. To know that a shift in perspective is always available to you.

Forest offers: "The imagery of the stars brought up a sense of beauty." Great. Often with a sense of beauty, awe, and grace, we can also have the sense of expansiveness of seeing our place instead of being in our own heads, overwhelmed. That image is always available to you; just close your eyes and imagine stars.

Kim offers an image of the "heart as wide as the world." Lovely. There's so much space. We don't often give ourselves, these amazing divine beings that we are, enough credit for what we are capable of in our ability to expand our hearts.

Neil shares: "I think it was very nice to talk about cheery things for a while. Thank you for giving us such a good assignment." I'm delighted to hear that—a sense of uplifting, talking about uplifting things for yourself and appreciating them from others.

Another shares: "We had two runners and one cross-country skier in the group. Physical exercise appears to be a positive influence on some people's lives right now." Fantastic, I love hearing that.

Jesse shares: "What I've noticed is that difficult situations, whether they're worldwide or for myself, are showing up more and more as opportunities to practice equanimity, and that just feels really wholesome. I'm also going to share a chanting resource with my small group, the chant for universal well-being, which has been really transformative in my own practice. I love this idea of freedom from hostility under all conditions and taking refuge in the Buddha, Dharma^[5], and Sangha^[6]." Thank you, Jesse. Especially how you spoke about a sense of transformation—the challenges in life feel like natural opportunities to practice equanimity.

Kim offers: "I had difficulty talking about uplifting things, but know it all belongs. Practicing equanimity is key." Yes, it's all good. We need to hold both the challenge and the beauty and the grace, not just topple over. Yes, it can be difficult, Kim.

Someone suggests: "Wow, this is such a great and supportive way to spend an hour in the evening." I agree!

Bill offers: "Much better than watching CNN." I agree. In fact, as a way of supporting myself, I didn't listen to the news for a whole week, and now I'm just limiting myself to checking in once a day.

Our time, dear ones, has come to an end together. Thank you all for your practice, for showing up for yourselves, for each other, and for those whose lives you touch directly and indirectly. May all beings everywhere be happy, be free, and their hearts be as spacious as the world.

Thank you all. Enjoy tomorrow. Take care, thank you so much, bye everyone.