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Guided Meditation: Friendly Toward Fear

Greetings and welcome to our morning meditation. One of the definitions of meditation that has inspired me for decades is that meditation is the continual act of befriending oneself—the continual act of being one's own friend. One of the ways to be a friend in practice is to be like a friend who is a wise elder, or a friend who is fully warm, kind, and friendly in the present, but has no needs from us. It's not trying to get anything from us and has a kind of clarity that allows us to be who we are. I think of it as a simple generosity, a simple friendship. Being very simple, clean, direct, and simply friendly is part of the name of this kind of friendship.

As we sit to meditate, it's possible that what most needs this kind of friendship is that inside of us which is afraid. To go further deep, that inside of us which gets threatened and feels threatened is something we should bring our friendship to. Bring a clean, simple friendship that, in a sense, allows it to be as it is and accompanies it with simple presence and recognition. A simple friendship that says, "I'm here with you. I'll accompany you. I'll sit down next to you, and let's see what happens."

So, taking a meditation posture that allows you to sit comfortably but also in a way that is alert. The spine gets adjusted a little bit so it feels a little more alert or slightly energized. And perhaps also for the chest—this wonderful chest we have that is the home for so much of our joys and challenges—allow the chest to gently, softly be opened. So there is an alertness, an openness, and a willingness deep inside the chest to be here, to be with what is.

Then, softly closing your eyes. As you exhale, letting your eyes rest a bit in their sockets, knowing there is nothing you need to be staring at or looking at.

As you exhale, softening the muscles of the face: the forehead, around the eyes, and the cheeks. Relaxing the jaw, perhaps by dropping the mouth open and floating the teeth back together lightly. Perhaps softening the shoulders, releasing them to the pull of gravity. Softening the belly.

Taking a moment or two to feel your whole body, a global experience of the body independent of your thinking. Whatever you're thinking, let that be put aside so you can silently feel and sense your body. If there are any ways that you're bracing yourself against life or holding yourself, perhaps as you exhale, you can relax and soften, as if gravity is a friend that you can let go into.

Gently, slowly, let your awareness receive the experience of breathing. The process of befriending yourself begins with a friendly receptivity to the body breathing. In whatever way the experience of breathing is happening, allow it to be that way with a simple friendliness, a simple friendship in the awareness of breathing.

Perhaps the experience of being friendly is not something you have to think about so much. Maybe it lives deep inside of you almost as a somatic feeling—an openness, a willingness, or a kindness. From some deep somatic place, accompany your breathing with a simple, receptive friendliness.

If you are able to offer some friendliness, a clean, simple friendship to what is, can you let yourself gently settle as deep inside of you as you can? Settle into whatever inner place is comfortable enough to be with that which is uncomfortable or easily threatened—the place where fear can arise. For only as long as you're comfortable, breathe with that place. See what happens if you can accompany that place with breathing, breathing through it, breathing with it, and being friendly to it. Not making it a problem, but rather something to accompany in a friendly way. Let the mind become quieter, as if you're listening to a friend and you're quiet so you can really hear.

When it becomes too uncomfortable to be with what's uncomfortable, by all means, you can step away and come back to a place of breathing that is more grounding and stabilizing. Do whatever is the most friendly thing you can do for yourself.

If there is anything that is challenging about being in meditation—for example, any distractibility we have—breathe with that in a friendly way. Let the mind be a little bit quieter so you can accompany and be present, mindful of that, as if all things benefit from our friendliness.

And then, as we come to the end of this sitting, turn your gaze outward. With your imagination, extend your vision out beyond where you're sitting. Out across your neighborhood, across the lands, rivers, and oceans. Over the mountains and the trees, through all the homes, towns, villages, cities, and cosmopolitan areas of this world. To all the people and living beings that inhabit it, going about their lives. Some afraid, some angry, some discouraged, some happy, some loving and joyful. Across this huge globe, turn your heart inside out to offer your friendliness to the whole world. Offer your kind regard, a friendliness that is simple and clean.

It's a friendliness that doesn't require you to be friends with everyone, but rather that you have a simple, clear kind regard that doesn't need or want anything from anyone. You're willing to hold them in your heart, willing to stay present and recognize whatever idea or feeling you have.

How wonderful it would be if these beings, these people, could be happy. How wonderful it would be if they could feel more peaceful, feel safe, and feel healthy. May it be that this day, these twenty-four hours, be a day that your wish for the welfare and happiness of all beings spreads out across the land to the people you'll encounter today and those you won't. May it be that you have ways today—very simple, ordinary ways or big ways—that you can in fact make this world a better place for other people. Supporting those who are hungry or oppressed, supporting those who are lonely and afraid, and supporting those who are discouraged and dismayed by the changes of our times. May you extend yourself for the welfare and happiness of the people of this world.

May all beings be happy.