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Happy Hour: Contentment

Introduction

Hi, hello, and welcome to all of you. It's lovely to be with you, to see you, and feel your presence here in this moment in time.

The topic for reflection today is one that comes out of practicing gratitude, which we did together all of last week and on Monday, too. The topic that I'd like to invite us to practice with is contentment. Contentment is closely intertwined with gratitude in the way we're going to explore it together. It comes out of appreciation for the ordinary, for the simple, for what's right here, right now.

Socrates said, "He who is not contented with what he has, would not be contented with what he would like to have." It's a pretty profound realization. Unless we are content with what is here right now, we will not be content with what we wish for. We often think, "I would be so happy, I would be content if I had that, if I wore that, if I became that, or if I didn't have this." Cultivating contentment comes out of appreciating what is already here.

The way I'd like to invite us to work with that today is by appreciating the simple, the ordinary, the mundane. By really bringing our awareness and mindfulness to it, the ordinary will feel sublime. When it's truly touched and sensed with awareness, mindfulness, and presence, the ordinary can feel sacred. There is a sacredness to the ordinary, even if it's a bundle of pain or challenges. That, too, is a possibility.

As I say this tonight, specifically, I'm not feeling great myself. So, this is what I'll be working with and have been working with today: touching into even what's not pleasant. There is still this sublime amazement. There can be a contentment with what has an unpleasant vedanā^[1], with what is not "perfect." There are so many ways that our minds can open up to contentment in this moment.

I'd like to invite us into our practice. Later, I will read a poem by Mary Oliver called Mindful. For now, this is an invitation to really see the sublime in the ordinary, meeting this moment just as it is with a sense of contentment.

Poem: Mindful

I'd like to share with you this poem by Mary Oliver called Mindful. Let it wash over you, dropping it in as a reflection.

Every day I see or hear something that more or less kills me with delight, that leaves me like a needle in the haystack of light. It was what I was born for — to look, to listen, to lose myself inside this soft world — to instruct myself over and over in joy and acclamation. Nor am I talking about the exceptional, the fearful, the dreadful, the very extravagant — but of the ordinary, the common, the very drab, the daily presentations. Oh, good scholar, I say to myself, how can you help but grow wise with such teachings as these — the untamable light of the world, the ocean's shine, the prayers that are made out of grass?

Can contentment feel tinged with this untamable light of the world? This delight, this grace, this beauty, the divinity. Contentment is such a glorious practice—bright, expansive, joyous. Consider contentment as this bright gift of generosity that we offer ourselves and others in how we can show up in the world, to support ourselves and serve others.

May all beings everywhere taste the nourishment of contentment shining brightly. And may we, in this moment, celebrate contentment with this period of practice. Whatever came up or did not come up, can there be an appreciation of just this, as it is, in this moment right now, starting right here.

Reflections and Q&A

Thank you all. Thank you for your practice. I'd love to invite you to share reflections, what came up for you, questions, or comments.

Elizabeth shared a reflection on YouTube starting with appreciation, saying, "I was feeling very scattered, and I'm grateful for this invitation to receive the breath. I felt appreciation for everyone here practicing. We're all walking each other home." Yes, thank you, Elizabeth. That is a beautiful quote from Ram Dass^[2]: "We're all walking each other home."

Bill says, "I was able to relax in this meditation more than I normally can, not straining for something." Great, glad to hear that, Bill. Maybe that is one thing for you to remember as your way into feeling the sense of contentment in this moment—not straining for something.

Question: I'm curious about your thoughts on the balance of contentment with where we are in life right now, versus the desire or motivation to practice and improve.

Nikki: I appreciate the question. In many ways, it's similar to the relationship between acceptance of this moment and still having a sense of aspiration. It is not expectation, as expectation can be graspy, but aspiration can be uplifting. Aspiring to wake up, aspiring to serve others, aspiring to be kinder and more compassionate. Aspiration is beautiful, and we don't want to give that away. Saying, "I'm just content with how I am, and if I'm being really nasty to people, I'm content with that," just doesn't quite have the right ring to it, of course.

The way to really feel into it is connected to gratitude and appreciation. You have an appreciation for what is here without giving up or giving in. The word I'm looking for is resignation. Resignation has an energy that is cold and not very uplifting. Also, when contentment falls too much into resignation, it gets a little self-satisfied. These are all nuances that we have words for, but you really need to feel into your heart and your body. You might veer into resignation, self-satisfaction, or inaction for a few days, and then you realize, "Wait a minute, this doesn't feel balanced." We aren't always on the straight path; it can sometimes go into grasping or into resignation. But it will self-correct as long as you stay mindful and aware.

Ben says, "I appreciate you saying 'don't push it.'" Yes, great, never push it. Ben also shared that at the end, when I suggested we consider being contented with the practice period, he was content with not having pushed for contentment. That's fantastic.

[Breakout groups]

Welcome back, everyone. We have just a few minutes for any remaining reflections.

Kevin: Thanks for that meditation. I found it especially great when you mentioned shifting awareness from what we don't have to what we have. We tend to orient ourselves to what we need to do and what we want, and that's all what we don't have, which requires thinking because it's not real. But what we do have is present, and you just look inside to what's real and what's here. So that was really nice for me.

Nikki: Thank you, Kevin. I appreciate you sharing what really supported you in turning towards the relationship between appreciation, gratitude, and looking at the cup that is full, instead of turning attention to what's not here as the basis for contentment.

Susan: The poem was just so beautiful and really touched me. It brought up gratefulness for the small things in life. Through that, I just felt a lot of contentment for appreciating the very small things in life, and that just made me feel a lot of joy. Thank you for this beautiful meditation and for sharing that beautiful poem by Mary Oliver.

Nikki: Thank you, Susan. Mary Oliver is amazing. Especially when one is settled and calm with the breath and the body, having her words drop in can really be supportive.

We have come to the end of yet another Happy Hour session together. Thank you so much for all the "feel better soon" messages I'm receiving. Thank you for your care, and thank you all so much for your practice—for showing up, supporting yourselves, supporting each other, and supporting the world. Deep bows to you for your practice.

May you be safe, happy, healthy, and have ease and contentment, and may our practice be of service to the whole world. Thank you all.