This is an AI-generated transcript from auto-generated subtitles for the video above. It likely contains inaccuracies, especially with speaker attribution if there are multiple speakers.

Guided Meditation: Meeting the Unwholesome with the Wholesome

Hello everyone, and welcome to our meditation together. The general theme this week is loving-kindness, in that we're looking at the Mettā Sutta^[1] at 7:30.

One of the interesting things to consider—very important things to consider—when doing meditation is when we have an unwholesome state of mind or unwholesome thoughts that arise, how do we react to that? What's our response to that? Ideally, what is unwholesome is met by what is wholesome. So an unwholesome state of mind, an unwholesome train of thinking, we bring to it some wholesome state of mind, some wholesome way of approaching it.

One of the simplest ways of doing that is to practice mindfulness. Mindfulness is considered always to be wholesome. Maybe some people would see it more as something neutral, because it's non-reactive, it's non-judgmental, it has a kind of neutrality in just allowing things to be, not being for or against it. But it turns out that kind of state of mind is beneficial, and it is onward leading to greater benefits, into happiness. So just to simply be aware of it is to bring wholesomeness. We don't have to dredge up some kind of love or kindness or compassion if we don't feel it. But we can bring forth our capacity to be mindful, recognizing it in its simplicity. Mindfulness is wholesome.

And the word simplicity is important, because sometimes we can be mindful, but we're also not just mindful, also thoughtful about what we're doing, so that the mindfulness is maybe mixed up with some unwholesome thoughts and attitudes. But to meet what's unwholesome with the wholesome, without condemnation, without shame, without defining oneself by the unwholesome, without being upset, just to see it clearly. And if it's possible to have kindness to it, or goodwill towards oneself in this state, that helps as well. But this is the art of bringing forth what is wholesome to meet whatever is unwholesome, so we don't let the unwholesome fester and get the upper hand.

So, taking a meditation posture.

This word wholesome is wonderfully connected to the word skillful. And so to take a posture that is skillful for you—a skillful posture that supports you to settle into the present moment, to be here.

Closing your eyes and taking a few long, slow, deep breaths. Maybe three-quarters full. Full enough so that you really feel your rib cage expand and stretch, you feel your torso a little more fully. Maybe even allowing your belly to expand. And as you exhale, maybe a little bit longer than usual, a leisurely exhale. Letting the exhale... with the exhale is a settling in your body.

Then letting your breathing return to normal, and taking a few moments to familiarize yourself with how it is to be breathing in an ordinary way.

And as you breathe, relax your body some more. Relaxing muscles of your face. Letting the muscles of your face fall away from the bones, the skull. The exhale relaxing the shoulders. The shoulders can fall away from the spine. And as you exhale, to relax the belly. Maybe softening the belly so the weight of your torso settles more deeply.

And then settling in with your breathing.

And if there's any unwholesome state of mind or train of thinking, can you let go of that? Maybe reminding yourself it's not needed right now. And if you can't let go of it, it's okay. Can you be aware of it simply? A wholesome state of awareness that simply recognizes it, knows it. So in a sense, you are the response. You are not the unwholesome state.

And the simplest wholesome state with which to respond is to be mindful, to see it for what it is. And then, if possible, with a wholesome attitude, wholesome mindfulness, settle down into your breathing, just to breathe in and breathe out. And if any unwholesome states of mind arise, return to what's wholesome, the wholesome mindfulness of breathing, or a wholesome recognition of the unwholesome state.

[Meditation continues]

And as we come to the end of this sitting, one of the ways of considering the end of meditation is that it has prepared us to enter the world in a new way, a different way. And one of the ways to do this is to turn the attention now towards the world around you, the people in your lives, communities, people in the world. And see if you can bring up a wholesome attitude towards them.

There are many wholesome attitudes, but some attitude or way of thinking about others that sees them in a good light, a positive light. To be ready to maybe be involved in the world again, of people, after this meditation, with an attitude of goodwill. Seeing and considering people have the capacity for happiness, and to wish it be so. And to maybe wish that whatever benefits have come from this meditation be used not at the expense of oneself, but as an enhancement of oneself, to be used for the welfare and happiness of others.

May all beings be happy. May all beings be safe. May all beings be peaceful. And may all beings everywhere be free.

Dharmette: Mettā Sutta (3 of 5) With No Anger

So we continue—I continue, then, with a series of talks on the Mettā Sutta, the discourse on loving-kindness. And as I'm doing it this week, it is by dividing the text into parts, kind of four parts. This next part is the shortest part of the text.

Paradoxically or ironically, the classic instructions for loving-kindness practice are found in a fifth-century meditation manual by a teacher named Buddhaghosa^[2]. It's a big book called the Visuddhimagga (The Path of Purification), and that's where the modern practice of loving-kindness—the most common way to practice—comes from. It's a big manual on meditation, and the ninth chapter of the book is about the brahmavihāras^[3]—the meditations on loving-kindness, compassion, sympathetic joy, and equanimity.

The biggest discussion is about the first one, loving-kindness. But in the section about loving-kindness, most of that section, many, many pages, has to do with overcoming resentment and anger. Because I guess one of the biggest obstacles for loving-kindness is if we have resentment towards someone, it's hard to have kindness or goodwill towards them. Or if we have anger towards them. And so it's really a treatise or instructions on overcoming anger more than it is teachings on loving-kindness.

So in the Mettā Sutta, this next part is about that, but it's only four lines. At this time, I think I've succeeded in posting this part of the Mettā Sutta, or actually what we've done so far, on the YouTube page where it says a little description of what we're doing underneath the video. If you click on "Show more," I think it will show it to you. And the bottom of that is:

Let no one deceive another, or despise anyone anywhere. Let no one through anger or aversion wish for others to suffer.

So here we have a call to put aside anything that gets in the way of goodwill. But this text is not only about loving-kindness; it's really about the path to liberation through loving-kindness. And the path to liberation cannot be found in being angry or despising or having aversion towards anyone, especially if that is a wish for them to suffer—a certain kind of hostility. That kind of feeling, that attitude, really goes against the grain of liberation. Because it involves getting unliberated, it involves getting entangled, or in bondage, or caught, not free. If we're caught in resentment or anger—and now, it's not necessarily all anger, but any anger that involves hostility, any anger that involves ill will towards someone, wishing others to suffer.

And so in this classic text on loving-kindness, a big section is about overcoming anger and resentment. It's kind of fun to read, because he gives instructions about what you can do. And then he says, "Well, if that doesn't work, then try this." And then he says, "If that doesn't work, try this. If that doesn't work, try this." It goes through a whole series of options. And then finally, as the last one, if nothing else works, then he says: get involved in the practice of gift giving. So either give the person that you're angry with or hostile with, give them a gift, or allow them to give a gift to you. Either direction, whatever is happening or easy, that's the last resort for overcoming anger and resentment. I don't know why it has to be last, why not just first, but anyway, it's the last one.

And in between, there are things like just drumming up loving-kindness for them, or thinking about the good qualities the person has. Or thinking about how, when there's anger and resentment, the person who has the anger and resentment is harming themselves. It literally says it is causing damage to oneself that the enemy cannot create. Others can cause us harm in a variety of ways, but to really get into the deepest parts of the heart and mind, in this ancient text, it says only you can do that by having anger or resentment or something like that.

So there are all these things to do, and maybe each of you has your own effective and skillful and respectful way of working with anger and resentments and aversion, hostility. I like to think of these states of mind as something that deserves—I don't know if deserves is the right word—but something that's well worth respecting. So not to have an automatic hostility towards our hostility, not to have an automatic aversion to our aversion or ill will. But to understand, to have respect for it. Sometimes we respect things which are dangerous, and so we respect these states because they are dangerous. We respect them partly because of their danger, and we want to be very careful with them so they don't cause harm, so we don't succumb to the danger that they bring. But also, they are kind of like messengers, and you don't want to kill the messenger.

And the messenger sometimes is that we are hurting in some ways, or the messenger is that there's something about ourselves that feels scared. Or the message is that there's something unwholesome going on inside of us, and that unwholesomeness needs attention if we want to find our way to the wholesome. So in fact, what is unwholesome inside of us might be the thing that most needs our goodwill, needs our compassion, needs our generosity of spirit. If we keep pushing away what's unwholesome inside of us, or pushing it down, it just festers and gets worse. And we live a kind of divided life between what we're willing to face and what we're ignoring.

And so, if you see anger sometimes as a messenger, what is the message? What's underneath the anger? What's behind it? Not a few times, part of what anger is, is something in ourselves that needs goodwill, that needs to be reassured, that needs maybe to be let go of—but not let go with hostility, but put down with respect and care, knowing that it's there. So this idea of living a wholesome life means to bring a wholesomeness to those parts of ourselves which are unwholesome. So in a sense, be our own friend that way.

And so when the Mettā Sutta says, "Let no one deceive another, or despise anyone anywhere. Let no one through anger or aversion wish for others to suffer," I see this first and foremost as directed towards ourselves. That we don't want to be this kind of way. We don't want to deceive anyone else or despise anyone, nor be angry or aversive towards anyone. And so to really cultivate putting those down, to cultivate the absence of this deception, the absence of tricking people or presenting ourselves different than who we are, or getting people to do what we want a little bit through manipulation. Don't despise anyone, respect everyone. Don't despise yourself. To enter this world of our unwholesome and begin looking how to put it down, relax it, heal it, bring forth what is wholesome, and put down any hostility.

"Let no one through anger and aversion wish for others to suffer." Now, logically maybe, it doesn't seem like any of you want that. But to be mean towards someone, to say something slightly mean, or even sarcastic, critical—kind of underneath it is a little bit like poking people maybe, or getting back at people. Or someone says something not so nice to us, and we respond in kind because we want to get back at them. There are all kinds of small ways in which we are kind of trying to irritate people or get back at them, get revenge or something. Even complaining sometimes is more than just complaining; it's a critique, a criticism that's kind of poking at people.

And so the idea is, if you really want to cultivate loving-kindness, really want to cultivate the path of liberation, there's a profound thing to be done, a very healthy thing to be done—I would say a very inspiring thing to do. And that is to overcome any tendency towards hostility, to learn to recognize it when it comes up and not give in to it. To learn to recognize it when it comes up and meet it with what's wholesome.

And so that our intention, the way that we are motivated to live our life, even though there might be some feelings that are difficult—angry feelings and all that—the important thing is the intention, what drives how we speak and act in the world. And in there, have no wish for others to suffer. Rather, this is the wish, this is the intention to come from, and that's the section just before that in the poem:

May all be happy and secure, may all beings be happy at heart. All living beings, whether weak or strong, tall, large, medium, or short, tiny or big, seen or unseen, born or to be born, may they all be happy.

So that's the art of loving-kindness, is to discover how to have this be the motivating force inside of us, this kind of goodwill. Having put aside the ill will that's there, or not acting on it, and healing it in some deep way. And so this is a very worthwhile way of living and practicing. Imagine if you memorized the Mettā Sutta and recited these words every day. This is a classic practice in Buddhism, to memorize a text like this and say it to yourself over and over again, and see the effect it has on us of saying these kinds of words.

So thank you, and I'll continue tomorrow.