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Introduction to Mindfulness Meditation Day Long Retreat - Liz Powell, Tanya Wiser

Initial Sitting and Welcome

So we're just going to have a sitting period between now and a little before ten o'clock to get settled and to allow people to come in. I don't want to offer too much instruction, but I do want to welcome you. I invite you to bring all of yourself here. If people do wander in, it's an opportunity to practice welcoming the disruptions. The sounds, the energy that's not settled—just see it and say, "Welcome." It's a nice practice to support an opening in your mind and heart to what's happening instead of resisting.

So as not to surprise you, if more people come in, I'll offer some more instructions at some point, maybe a little more guidance. You're welcome to just ignore my voice at any point. Welcome.

One of the first things we invite people to do when we start Vipassana^[1] practice is to find an upright, embodied posture and to create some sort of anchor to help your mindfulness stay present. The anchor can be the breath flowing in and out. If the breath works well for you, it's a nice one because it has a rhythm, but it changes—it comes and goes. We can connect with the breathing in a variety of ways: feeling the air flow through the nostrils, or in the belly, chest, or the whole body.

If the breath doesn't quite work well for you, you might experiment with resting your awareness in the feelings of your hands or your body sitting on your chair. What we're wanting is an anchor that is easy for you to connect with. Another option is sound. When we do listening meditation, we're receiving. Receiving sounds, receiving the breath, receiving sensations.

Just check in today to notice your body, your mind, your heart. What part of your experience is it easiest to connect with that helps you stay here, connected with present-moment experience?

In Vipassana, we tend to close our eyes for meditation, but it is not required. Sometimes it's very useful and helpful to open our eyes to help us orient or ground. If you like to practice with eyes open, it can be supportive to let your eyes gently rest a little bit ahead of you, maybe a little bit down in front of you. Just a gentle focus, not a searching or looking, but more just a soft gaze.

This morning, before we begin the formal welcome, it's a great opportunity to just check in and notice how your mind and body are. What's easy to connect with that keeps you here? Play a little bit with this, helping yourself slowly enter into this day of practice. Welcome whatever comes up as much as you can. Fear, resistance, not liking, hoping—all of it can just be seen and allowed to come in and move through. This is maybe one of the most important moments of the day: establishing a relationship with your experience, establishing an anchor for your awareness.

Just noticing what you're aware of now. Maybe lost in thought, maybe with your anchor or the sound. Just as gently as possible, sit back metaphorically, perhaps energetically, in your body. Relax a little bit more. Nothing has to happen.

The posture in your mind might be an image of somebody upright but leaning back a little, hands with palms open. A receptive stance. Being soft with experience, patient.

Maybe doing a slight, gentle body scan. Inviting the head, the face, the forehead, the jaw to relax. Maybe even opening the mouth a little bit. Inviting the eyes, forehead, and temples to soften. Sort of like warm honey, bringing your attention down through the head, neck, and face into the shoulders. Letting go of anything extra that isn't needed.

Allowing that soft, warm attention to gently flow down through the arms, inviting the muscles, even the bones, to soften just a bit. Through the chest, back body, the heart, the lungs, the belly. Good morning, body. Good morning, muscles. Welcome. May you be at ease.

Down into the hips and pelvic area. Down through the legs, feeling the fronts, backs, and sides of the legs. Maybe noticing the aliveness of the body. Into the ankles, and the feet.

Introduction and Orientation

Good morning everyone. My name is Liz Powell, and together with Tanya Wiser, we're very happy to be offering this day-long introduction to mindfulness meditation. This is a good time if you'd like to stretch or do whatever you need to do since we've been sitting for a little while.

I'm going to offer you a little orientation to the space we're sitting in. I also want to welcome and thank Richard, who is our manager today. The three of us have been meditating for a while. This is my eighteenth year, much to my surprise, of meditating in this community.

If you haven't been to this space before, welcome. There are bathrooms in the back of the hall, and a counter with hot water for tea or coffee. There is also a kitchen with a sink and refrigerator if you brought lunch. Feel free to use this as your home. If you have trouble hearing, there are hearing assistive devices in the Social Hall. If my voice gets really quiet during guided meditation, raise your hand or say something out loud because we don't want you to miss it.

During the day, there is a sign-up sheet on the stage for practice discussions. You can sign up for a short opportunity to talk with Tanya or me, ask questions, get acquainted, and ask about what's going on for you in the meditation. We'll also have a question-and-answer period later.

This is one of the wonderful things about Insight Meditation Center: it's entirely run by volunteers. We ask that at the end of this day-long, if a few of you could stay late for just fifteen minutes to help sweep the floors and throw the trash out, we would appreciate it.

One very important thing to know about today is that there are no mistakes. Nothing can go wrong. Everything that we're doing today is an opportunity just to be aware of what's happening. I would like you to be able to relax and enjoy the day.

To support our practice, we invite silence in the hall. It helps us keep watching our minds and not get lost in interactions. During lunch, we'll invite people to talk outside.

Please feel free to go out and get more cushions, or shift from chair to floor or floor to chair. When I first came here, I had no introduction class and sat down on the floor. Within fifteen minutes, I was sweating and in so much pain, thinking I couldn't move a muscle. I don't want it to be like that for you. You're allowed to move and get yourself comfortable.

Welcome to those who are new, those who have taken intro classes with Tanya and Kodo, and those who have been practicing for a while. This day is for everyone. What we're going to be doing is called mindfulness meditation, also called Insight Meditation. What is mindfulness? A lot of teachers say it's paying attention on purpose to what is happening right here and now, moment to moment, in the body, in the emotions, in the mind, in your surroundings. Largely, we're turning inward and paying attention to what's arising in us now.

Over time, as we notice what's happening now, we may also be able to see patterns and conditioned habits. What comes up routinely may start to teach us quite a bit about how we've been conditioned over our lifetime. This practice of mindfulness cultivates a clear, stable, non-judgmental awareness. Awareness is a capacity we all have, but we're going to aim it at specific things.

This meditation practice can bring calm and clarity to our daily life and the pressures we experience. It's also available as a spiritual path that helps us gradually experience more freedom and happiness. It dissolves barriers to wisdom, compassion, and other beautiful human qualities.

We will begin with mindfulness of breathing, then do some walking meditation, coming into mindfulness of our bodies. We'll come back and do a sitting where we develop mindfulness of the body, taking in different kinds of sensations. Next, we'll move into mindfulness of emotions, followed by mindfulness of thinking. Finally, we'll practice open awareness—paying attention to the changing flow of what's happening.

As we focus on each of these, we're going to use them as anchors. For example, if a sailor has been working hard all day, they might drop an anchor into the water to provide a stable point so the boat is no longer blown by the wind or caught by currents. Similarly, we use the breath to stabilize our awareness. When the mind goes off, we gently return our attention to the breathing. When we start out, we have what some people call "monkey mind"—jumping all over the place. If you experience that, it's no problem.

We'll offer lightly guided meditations, followed by quiet time so you can notice what happens in your mind and body. Guided meditations are a bit like training wheels. Eventually, you take them off and practice in silence, seeing what happens and learning about your conditioning.

Regarding posture, it does not matter if you use a chair or cushions. You can even use a standing posture if you are super sleepy or need a break. In a chair, have your feet flat on the floor, knees slightly lower than your hips or level. Place your hands comfortably in your lap. If you sit on the floor, form a sturdy tripod with your knees and sit bones. Your upper body should balance alertness and relaxation. I think of additional space between my vertebrae, tuck my chin just a little bit, and lift my shoulders and drop them back. It takes time to find this balance, so feel free to make adjustments.

If something is uncomfortable, you can intentionally and mindfully move. Recognize the discomfort, recognize you're going to move, and follow what happens in your body as you make the adjustment. If you are in pain when you get up, you might be starting to injure yourself, so please find ways to support yourself.

With any posture or anchor, we're developing our ability to pay attention to our immediate experience instead of being preoccupied with the past or future. Mindfulness is learning how to overcome those preoccupations by coming into the lived experience right now. Awareness by itself doesn't judge, resist, or cling; it just notices. We're not trying to achieve an altered state or be different than how we are right now. We are being with just the way things are.

The freedom is actually in seeing that you're no longer enslaved by something. We can develop a friendlier, more compassionate relationship with whatever comes up. Mindfulness is simply attentively being present with what's happening here and now, on purpose, no matter what it is. We practice it in the same way we practice a musical instrument—coming back to it again and again. Relax, enjoy the day, and appreciate anything you're discovering.

Guided Meditation: Mindfulness of Breathing

Finding your posture, finding your body. Giving it to your cushion, the earth, your chair, your bones to hold. Letting things settle.

Just in this simple, direct way, connecting with your felt, lived, present-moment experience. Your mind will think. Seeing if you can play with resting more awareness on the directness of your experience.

We'll start that with the breath this morning. Seeing if the breath can be in the center of your awareness, the center of your experience. It can be helpful to start with some longer, slower, fuller, and conscious breaths. With the exhale, it can be helpful to invite a letting-go feeling. Maybe with the inhale, bringing your shoulders up toward your ears, squeezing in that way, and then with the exhale, letting the shoulders fall back and down.

Breathing in, I calm my body. Breathing out, I calm my mind.

We'll become a little bit more intimate with our breathing experience. Maybe just starting with knowing you're breathing in as you breathe in, and knowing you're breathing out as you breathe out. You can know this by the sensation, the feeling, and the flow. If it's helpful, you can do a quiet noting in your mind of "in" with the inhale, and "out" with the exhale. Seeing what's supportive for you, what helps you connect more fully with the inhale and the exhale.

If it's helpful, you can also start to include awareness of the breath as it leaves and enters. Maybe noticing the temperature of the breath where it touches your nostrils. How it feels different coming in versus out. You might also notice the feeling of it in your throat, or feeling the chest as it expands with the inhale and contracts with the exhale. You may feel it in your belly, giving your belly permission to expand with the inhale and to relax with the exhale.

Just being curious where it's easiest for you to feel the flow of the breath. What part of your experience of breathing can you rest into more easily? There's no need to try and stop from thinking, hearing, or feeling. It's more about trying to invite the breath to be in the foreground or the center of your awareness. Just holding a little bit closer to it, a little more intimate with that part of your experience.

Maybe just three breaths at a time, seeing if you can follow the full flow of the in and the out for three breaths in a row.

Being easy with ourselves, with our experience. Soft and gentle with whatever is happening.

Just in case there's some struggle in the mind, maybe just inviting the mind to help you attend in a simple way to receiving the experience of breathing. Not trying to force it, but more like an invitation. Maybe like if you have a puppy, you gently pick it up and invite it to a particular area. Not yanking it around, and knowing that we need to be gentle and persistent.

Maybe in the way that we learn to enjoy the puppy while we're also watching over it, knowing that it needs a certain amount of room. In the same way, can we give our own minds a little bit of room while staying connected to the experience that the body knows how to do? The breathing is so natural. The first thing we do when we come into this world is inhale, and the last thing we do when we leave this world is to exhale. A constant companion.

Walking Meditation Instructions

If you're new to meditation, you may see us bowing at the end of meditation. That's just a way of acknowledging—I've heard it said that the light in me sees the light in you. It's just an acknowledgment. You don't have to do it, but I wanted people to know why we do that.

Next, we'll have a chance to do a half hour of walking meditation. When we do walking meditation, the anchor is the feeling in the feet and legs. You find a place to walk—crosswise in the hall, outdoors on the front porch, in the gravel, or on the sidewalks of the neighborhood. You pick a path maybe 15 to 20 steps long. Instead of taking a walk, we're walking back and forth. That gives us an opportunity to stay focused on the feet and legs, returning our attention.

Pick a pace that fits with the pace of mindfulness. This varies by person. A lot of people like to slow down a little bit, some people like to slow down a lot, but choose whatever supports you to return your attention to your feet and legs. It's not that other things won't happen. Your eyes may be caught by some bright flower, or you may pick up the sound of a bird. It's fine to pause, notice what the awareness has been drawn to ("Ah, hearing"), then come back, focus again on the feet and legs, and continue with the walking.

If you are out on the sidewalks, please be considerate of neighbors who might be walking by and move out of the way. Take your time and see what you discover as you walk.

Often what I do is pause at the beginning of my walking path and allow my attention to collect. For some people, they're just noticing the movement of their feet and legs. If the mind drifts off, come back to the feet and legs. When you come to the end of the path, take a breath, pause, and notice the movement as you turn around. For other people, they like to feel the lifting, the motion, the settling of the foot against the ground. You can do it in a more general way or a more focused way.

Above all, relax and enjoy. See what you discover about what happens in the mind and body as you walk.

Guided Meditation: Mindfulness of the Body

We're building our ability to notice what's happening right here and now. We're starting with the breath as an anchor, or the movement of our feet and legs in walking meditation, using those anchors to stabilize attention. We're going to move in this next meditation from the sensations of breathing to a broader sense of feeling in the body, the rest of our physical experience.

The body is always operating in the present moment. Breathing, the heart beating—everything is going on in the present moment. When we bring the mind to those things, they're working in harmony. This is different than if you sit your body down here and your mind is planning what you'd like to eat for dinner.

First, we'll take in sensations of breathing as fully as possible, and then we'll turn to the body. The mindfulness or awareness we're bringing is not in itself commentary, judgment, or evaluation. We're just training ourselves to notice how the body feels. Commentary and judgment may happen anyway. If they come up, you can just notice it, release that, relax, and return to the breathing or the body.

For some of us, we spend so much time thinking that we're not so aware of our body, and it may be a slow reawakening. Don't worry if that's the case. Sometimes we can use a word like "here" to bring ourselves back to the body here and now.

Giving yourself a moment to re-establish your posture in a way that's alert, yet relaxed. Taking time to make those little adjustments, maybe rolling the shoulders, taking a few longer, slower breaths. Letting the breathing return to normal.

It can be helpful to scan the body from head to foot, noticing sensations in the head right now. The scalp, the forehead, the cheeks, and jaw. Perhaps bringing some ease to them, letting the jaw drop open a little. Letting attention flow down the neck to the shoulders, perhaps allowing the shoulders to drop a little. Letting the weight of the arms and hands rest comfortably on your legs or lap.

Letting attention glide down the back: upper, middle, lower back. If it's possible to soften an area, you can soften it. If there's activity there that remains, simply notice that it's there. It's not a problem. With the next exhale, perhaps relaxing the belly, softening the hips, letting gravity receive the weight of the legs and feet against the floor.

You may become more broadly aware of the entire body sitting here. You might feel a sense of aliveness, a little bit of vibration or pulsing, energy or relaxation, sleepiness or alertness, warmth or cool air. Just allowing yourself to take in that broader sense of the body sitting here.

To get a feeling for what it is to feel the sensations of the body, turn the attention to the sensations in the right hand. You might feel a light pressure where the hand is in contact with your leg or your other hand. Perhaps there's some warmth or coolness. Perhaps you can feel a little pulsing or vibration in the fingertips. Taking in whatever sensations are present. Sometimes we can be aware of an absence of sensation, and that's also fine.

Returning to a broader sense of the overall body. Becoming aware of how the body experiences the sensations of breathing. Wherever you feel the physical sensations of breathing, center on those sensations. If there's any commentary or evaluation, simply notice it and gently return attention to breathing in and breathing out.

Then, letting go of any effort to be with the breathing and allowing your attention to turn to the strongest or most obvious sensations in the body. It might be the feeling of your hands resting against your thighs or your feet against the floor. If it disappears as you are aware of it, allow your attention to be present for the next prominent sensation that arises.

If there is discomfort in the body, simply notice that. No need to try to get rid of it or focus in on it. Just include it in a global sense of the body sitting here. If the attention has drifted away into thinking or sounds, simply noting where it went and gently returning to the most prominent sensation in the body right now.

If a sensation in the body is getting very strong, it's possible to be with it from a greater distance. Imagining being a bird high above the building and taking in the strong sensation from a distance. If it's getting to be too much, mindfully move to a more comfortable posture, staying with the sensations of the movement and noticing what changes after the movement.

Returning the attention to what the most prominent sensation is now. Entering the sensation more fully. Feeling whether it varies or is steady. Seeing if it stays or dissolves.

Reflections on Body Meditation

It's usual in our tradition that breathing is placed at the center as the grounding anchor at the beginning. There are some people for whom the breath is useful and some for whom the breath is not so useful. When I first began practicing, I wasn't so able to use breathing, so I used the body as my anchor until my attention became stable enough for me to turn to breathing.

There's no agenda for what you pay attention to. Arthritis sensations in the knee—mindful of that. Returning to the breathing—mindful of that. Just using whatever anchor you're using as a way to come back and stabilize the attention. There's no hurry with any of this. It's sometimes called a purification process, meaning we're becoming aware of all the ways we've been conditioned.

Being present with these sensations in the body again and again can begin to help the body relax over time. I went through many retreats in the beginning years of my practice where it felt like the whole retreat was working with discomfort in the body, and then over time, my body was more relaxed. We start to become aware of habitual preferences, cravings, aversions, judgments—all the stuff that comes up. We get a chance to understand it more deeply.

Morning Q&A and Reflections

Corey: During the walking meditation, when I was putting my attention on my feet and legs, I noticed all the little tiny adjustments happening just to maintain balance. I noticed how wobbly I was. Then I put attention on the act of willing myself to move forward more gracefully. When I put my intention on that, my body naturally did it. I thought that was really interesting.

Liz Powell: That's great to observe. You're bringing your awareness more intimately to something we maybe don't usually pay attention to. You get to see all that goes into walking, and how it can feel wobbly. Your mind responded well to the intention to feel more smooth in the walking. The body has an intelligence of its own; it's a wonderful thing to witness.

Abhishek: I was diagnosed with gout more than two months ago. Just a simple walk made me realize where it hurts. I've had it for two months but didn't have that deep realization, so I would push myself to walk more. Figuring out how the leg balances things out and where it hurts was insightful.

Liz Powell: It is so interesting as our bodies change over time to notice the different sensations and the compensations that happen. The tiny little adjustments that the body is sensitive to are pretty amazing.

Participant: I think my thoughts tend to wander when there's more silence. But then when you say something else, I can bring my attention back. When I noticed that I was thinking, I thought, "I'm thinking," and then I would try to bring myself back. I felt a little bad a few times, like I was drifting away.

Tanya Wiser: One thing that has helped me is to know that the moment we wake up to thinking, we're aware already. It's an opportunity to appreciate, "Oh, it happened. Awareness came back," and choose to rest into that. It is tempting to get critical, but that reinforces being critical instead of reinforcing gratitude or receptivity. Very experienced teachers who have been teaching for decades say, "Wow, my mind was just thinking and thinking," and they keep coming back. It's not a problem.

Noel: Because of COVID and the center shutting down, it was a great loss for me. Now that it's reopening, I'm very anxious that it be successful. I experienced personal disappointment when I saw that not a lot of people were here. I began to gallop into a sense of fear of this collapsing. It bruises a little bit of my pleasure just being here because of my anxiety that this Sangha^[2] be restored and its vitality be restored. That's what I sit with now.

Liz Powell: Noel, I want to thank you for sharing. That's a lot of mindful awareness of what is actually going on. You may not be the only person experiencing responses to COVID and noticing the emotions sitting here with the hall looking like this. I want to share that for me, even if one person shows up, I'm delighted to be with that one person. And this Sangha is very healthy.

Nena: When I sit to meditate, a pressure or pain comes to my heart, and I can sit for hours with it. Because of somatic experiencing training, I sometimes turn my attention to other places in my body that are more comfortable, like the back or the feet. My concern is that coming back to the breath might cause a certain amount of spiritual bypass—disregarding a deeper relationship to what is coming up. Do you have any suggestions on how to sit with this without creating a spiritual bypass, but redirecting while creating a deeper relationship with what's happening?

Liz Powell: Spiritual bypass is when you take something from a spiritual tradition as a way to escape deeper issues in your life. You could feel very soothing coming back to the breath while ignoring that a relationship is falling apart. As you get into practice more deeply, conditioned habits and past trauma may present themselves. Because you're alert to the possibility of spiritual bypass, I have a feeling you won't fall into it for too long. Be patient with how much it hurts, and occasionally drop in the question, "What is this?" and let it reveal itself to you over time. I noticed over a long period sitting here that my shoulder was always tight. It took many years to become aware that this is called "guarding the heart"—the musculature protecting a heart that's been hurt. Just being aware of what's in that heart allowed the body to relax over time.

Tanya Wiser: One thing to really pay attention to is the results of however you practice. Try practicing differently with the heart and notice what happens. You keep tuning in and listening to what happens inside of you. If a perspective comes up that has some judgment or impatience, don't let that slip without being seen.

Instructions for Mindful Eating

We're going to turn to lunch in a few minutes. Are you surprised to learn that it's another opportunity for mindfulness? There's a beautiful practice of mindfulness of eating that can begin right now as you think about lunch. What comes up in you? Do you feel sensations of hunger, or are you not hungry at all? Are you bored with lunch, or excited?

As you walk to lunch and start to eat, you can practice noticing the sight, the sound, and the smell of the food. You can feel the body sensations of lifting it to your mouth, placing it in your mouth, tasting, and chewing. Notice the difference between the beginning of the tasting and the end. Feel the sensations of swallowing. Sometimes people put their spoon or fork down between bites, take a breath, and then begin the practice again. It can be that detailed, or it can simply be noticing what's happening to the heart and mind around eating.

We will set up tables outside. One table will be in silence for those who want it, and others will be for conversation. If you're speaking, practice mindfulness of speaking: pause, take a breath, notice what's arising in you, and keep in touch with what's going on in you as you speak. When others are speaking, practice mindfulness of listening: are you really taking in what they're saying, or is an urgency building up to share your own thoughts?

Mindfulness of Emotions and the RAFT Practice

The way Vipassana is taught is sort of like concentric circles. We start with the breath, expand to include the breath and body, and then expand to breath, body, and emotions.

Emotions are a pretty dynamic part of our lives. Part of being alive is having emotions. It's not possible to try and prevent negative emotions without also blocking positive emotions. In this practice, the instructions are to learn how to be with emotions and allow them to flow through without clinging to them or pushing them away. When we try to block feelings, we move into a frozen, numb space. That shuts us off from connecting fully with life. Another thing that can happen is we repress feelings like a spring, pushing it down until it rebounds and we get flooded with an overwhelming emotion.

We want to let feelings arise and pass away, allowing ourselves to be moved by experience without getting carried downstream by them. Emotions come with energy; they want expression. Sometimes those expressions aren't helpful to ourselves or others. Think about rivers: emotions are like the water, and what we can learn to be is the riverbed that holds the space for the flow of the water.

The natural lifespan of an emotion—the average time it takes for it to move through the nervous system and body—is a minute and a half. Sometimes just holding that in mind can help us turn toward it and be willing to feel it. But we all know we don't just feel things for a minute and a half. What happens is we're retriggering our thoughts and our reactions, feeding that emotional state. Every time we retrigger, it's another minute and a half.

In the Buddha's simile, he talks about getting hit with an arrow, which causes pain. He asks, "Now imagine getting struck with another arrow, and another arrow. Does the pain grow over time?" Yes. The Buddha is saying that those extra arrows are optional. That's the retriggering of emotional states, self-criticism, stories, and reactions to our reactions that cause deeper suffering. Can we just let the one arrow come in and be with it without adding more?

Because emotions can be complicated, I'm going to offer a structured guided practice with the acronym RAFT (R-A-F-T-T).

Notice what emotions are present for you right now. The R is for Recognize. A simple acknowledgment: "I see you, sadness. I see you, anxiety." Of the things that are present, is there something small and manageable that you can turn toward?

The A is for Allow. Allowing the truth of this emotion to be seen and felt. Can we allow knowing and connecting with this emotion in this moment?

If there is a simple "yes," the F is to Find and Feel where that emotion resides in the body. Leave the story connected to it behind and simply find and feel it. If you can't allow it, maybe turn toward the resistance and practice with that. Not resisting and not succumbing, being the banks of the river, allowing the emotional energy to flow through. That may be all you need to do.

If you're still working with an emotion, the first T is to Tease apart the different pieces that are here. There might be a memory, an image, a story, a belief, or an expectation present as well. Imagine a big, spacious room with a large table, and invite each piece to have its own seat. Give everything space to untangle. Watch out for thoughts like, "Why did I do that again?" because that is yet another part to tease apart. Sit at the head of the table in your awareness, taking it in with perspective.

The second T is Trust. Finding and connecting with what we can trust in this situation. Can we trust awareness and mindfulness? Can we trust that emotions come and go, that things change? Can you take refuge in what you can trust: the Dharma^[3], the Buddha, the Sangha? See if you can linger in what you can trust for the last few minutes of the practice.

As Helen Keller said, "The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched—they must be felt with the heart."

Guided Meditation: Mindfulness of Thinking

Giving yourself time to settle into a meditative posture. Perhaps sitting up a little straighter to bring some energy into the body. Creating a strong core around which you can relax.

Beginning by entering into the world of breathing. For now, letting go of any thoughts or concerns so you can better feel the physical experience of breathing. If any thoughts arise, let go of them or let them recede into the background.

Now, with calm and deliberateness, let go of paying attention to your breathing and simply notice when you're thinking. You're welcome to think; no need to stop thinking now. But as you're thinking, be clearly aware that thinking is happening. Rather than letting go of thinking, look at it directly head-on. If your thoughts disappear or fade away as you watch them, that's quite natural. Just wait until they come back or return to mindfulness of breathing until thinking begins again.

Perhaps when you notice thinking arising, whisper very softly in the mind, "Thinking, thinking."

What you are thinking is not so important, but as you pay attention to thinking, notice other aspects besides the content. Notice if you're thinking in images, or if it's like a movie. Are you thinking in words or conversation? Are the images fuzzy or clear? What is the tone of the words? Is there an inner voice that thinks? Is it harsh, or soft and gentle? Are your thoughts pushing you, or are they supportive and accepting? Allow yourself to explore the texture of the thoughts.

Is there a lot of energy in the thinking, or is it very subtle? Notice if there are any emotions connected to what you're thinking about. The thinking might be coming out of a particular emotion. If so, quietly note the emotion as well as the thinking.

If thinking goes away as you're mindful of it, allow the space that's left behind, enjoying the spaciousness of a quiet mind.

Notice if there's a physical side to any thinking. Is there pressure or tension connected to thinking somewhere in the body? Tightness in the brain, tightening of the forehead or around the eyes? Soften any tension you find. As you exhale, release the tension the way you might relax a muscle—relaxing the thinking muscle.

Now, letting go of thinking enough to re-center yourself on breathing. Re-entering into the world of your breathing, seeing if you can stay connected through a whole series of breaths.

Reflections on Thinking

Life on planet Earth can be likened to living with all kinds of variations in the weather. In meditation, we have periods when it's like a calm day with blue skies. Other times, it's like a storm has arisen and suddenly we're in the middle of thunderclouds of emotion or a blizzard of thoughts.

Sometimes the analogy is used that the mind is like a clear blue sky and thoughts are like clouds passing by. Sooner or later, a thought cloud floats by, or a whole storm of thoughts comes. We may not even see it coming. A really common one is planning for tomorrow, or thinking about the past and living in the world of regrets or beautiful memories. We get caught on those clouds and lose our groundedness and independence.

One of the things we're doing with mindfulness practice is returning again and again to the groundedness of awareness. We can't stop thinking from arising, but we don't necessarily have to pick it up. Instead of picking up the content, we could look at how the face tenses up when thinking, or the tone of the voice.

When we learn to clearly see thinking, we have a choice of how to relate to it instead of being dragged around by it. We start to become a little less identified with it. We are not our thoughts. It can be challenging to let go of all the stories we create about ourselves, so an important part of mindfulness is learning to see this phenomenon of thinking. We're not at war with it, but we get to be more grounded with it.

By learning to be mindful of thinking, we can notice patterns—planning, ruminating, fantasizing. Every time you step back from thinking and just notice that it's happening, you're no longer enmeshed in it. This is a huge movement of mind and it takes time because we've developed a lifetime of being enmeshed in our thinking.

When a thought arises and it's easy to let go of, let it go and come back to the breathing. When it's difficult and you get caught, the moment you realize you were thinking is always a great moment. We're strengthening our ability to be aware in the here and now, which leads to more freedom.

Guided Meditation: Open Awareness

As you come in and take your seats, notice how you are right now. Allow yourself some space to receive and connect with your own experience. Feeling tired, feeling energized. Meeting what shows up with a sense of receptivity, welcoming, allowing.

Inviting the inside space to be like the meditation hall. There's a lot more space than there are things. In the same way, can we open up inside, expand our awareness, and create a sense of spaciousness?

Maybe there were moments today of surprise. During a walking period, the wind was blowing the redwood tree, and it sounded like rain. Every little dried thing that came down made me smile. It was a delight. Maybe there were some moments like that for you today—a different way of relating to a thought or a feeling. Give it some space right now to be held in this wide riverbank.

Just like the sky is incredibly spacious and generous, does the sky care that planes fly through? Does it care that there's a storm or that it's clear? The sky is fine with it all; it knows it's the sky.

This is the practice we'll invite now: spacious open awareness. When you find that you have a hard time being spacious, it's okay to find your anchor and breathe a little bit. Grounding, centering, and then when it feels okay, relaxing and opening up again. No mistakes, just being as easy as you can with whatever arises.

Can we be with the knowing? Allowing experiences, thoughts, and emotions to move through and watch. We don't have to be them. I am not my thoughts; I am not my feelings. It's a part of my experience and I can know it.

We're trained to notice things—chairs, decorations, people. In this practice, the invitation is to do the opposite: to notice the space in between things. To look up, around, to broaden and expand. To invite the mind to be open and spacious. Connect with awareness, knowing it all, and noticing the space, the emptiness, the allowing.

It might be really helpful to notice the gaps. The end of a sound fading away. New sounds will come, and notice when they fade. Hold your attention on the gaps and endings. Soaking in those moments of quiet. Receiving the space.

If it feels appropriate, you might gently and slowly open your eyes and notice what they take in. Then see if you can shift your gaze to something that is space: a gap, openness, light. Try to hold your attention on that emptiness. The objects are still there, but we're shifting our awareness. Close your eyes again and practice connecting with the spaciousness, the sky within.

Afternoon Q&A and Reflections

Participant: I've noticed that meditation helps mitigate the symptoms of strong negative core beliefs, but it doesn't really feel like it addresses the core beliefs themselves. How do you work with that?

Liz Powell: It's great that you noticed that your thoughts and emotions are coming out of core beliefs. We all get conditioned into views about ourselves, others, and how the world works. Allowing time for yourself to see the manifestations of that is much more valuable than you might imagine. Sometimes these play out in how we hold our body, how we think, and how we interact. Taking time to notice that world, what's underneath the core beliefs may gradually unfold for you. It's a process that requires a lot of patience.

Tanya Wiser: A core belief is sort of like believing the Earth is round. It's unquestionable; you don't even know it's there because it's so accepted. They are very structural, so they can be hard to notice. When you see a core belief, open up around it with curiosity. "How do I know the Earth is round? What would it be like if I believed the Earth was flat instead?" Loosening it up and exploring it in that way might be helpful.

Jan: I'm blown away with how moved I am to be in the space again after COVID. The Buddha statue is so unperturbed, and the redwood tree... a lot of feelings have come up. Thank you, Liz and Tanya, I feel very nurtured.

Diane (via YouTube): Working with emotions, I sometimes tend to go down the rabbit hole of looking for why that emotion came up.

Liz Powell: One thing that's interesting about mindfulness is oftentimes we can let go of the "why" and just notice that something is happening. Anger is arising, joy is arising, disappointment is arising. We notice how it affects the body and how thoughts spin out of it. Things can transform just by noticing them. Of course, it can be very helpful to understand the origin of emotions, so meditating on or journaling about the background of your emotional life is also a worthy area of study.

Tanya Wiser: Diane, your description of going down the rabbit hole is very visceral. It shows you have an awareness of what it feels like to get entangled in the emotion. The opposite of that might be the riverbed: allowing things to flow through and opening up around the experience. Is it possible to create a little bit of space? Emotion is an experience we're having, but it's not who we are. If we're over-involved in it, we don't have the space to let it move through, and we reignite it.

Liz Powell: There's a quote by Rick Riordan: "You can't think your way out of your emotions." They are already here, and they are a record of our conditioning.

Participant: If you're with an emotion and you don't understand why it was triggered, do you just let that be and be okay with it?

Liz Powell: Yes, you recognize what you can about it. Even if it's murky, feel how it feels in the body. Trust that it's there for a reason, and you can be with the fact that it's there.

Tanya Wiser: One way neuroscience describes the brain is that it is an organ whose job is to predict based on past experience or associations. Sometimes emotions can be triggered before we're even conscious of what's going on because the brain is predicting something.

Liz Powell: One of the gifts of mindfulness is it gives us choice. Having the capacity to sit back and pause gives us so much more freedom. Elizabeth Gilbert said, "Your emotions are the slaves to your thoughts, and you are the slave to your emotions." Without the capacity to witness, let go, pause, and choose, that's what happens. But you'll come to a point where you see the rabbit hole and decide, "I'm not going down there; it's not worth it." Most of the horrible experiences in my life have never happened; the mind created them. You can see the choice.

Loving-Kindness (Metta) Practice and Closing

Take a moment to recognize how much you've been through today. You've been through a significant amount of practice. Appreciate that whatever you put into today, every moment of mindfulness matters. The fruits of it may not be apparent right away, but later something has subtly shifted. Notice what your relationship is with what has happened today.

Reflect on any wholesome or helpful feeling that has come up for you today, even if you're just a little bit calmer than you were when you came in. Landing on and feeling beneficial states reinforces those beautiful qualities. If today showed you some difficulties, that's also excellent. Keep in mind that this is called the gradual path; it slowly unfolds us in our own time.

You can take this practice back into your life using mini mindfulness breaks. Take three breaths, tune into the body when you walk, or catch yourself in the middle of thinking. By noticing what you're feeding, you build steadiness. As the story of the two wolves goes: the wolf you feed grows stronger, and the wolf you don't feed grows weaker.

We'll end today with a practice working with qualities of loving-kindness, compassion, equanimity, and sympathetic joy. This is also called Metta^[4] practice. It is often done in the form of phrases.

Find a comfortable posture and take some breaths. Bring to mind the effort you've put in today. See the part of yourself that would really like to be more free, peaceful, and happier in the world. Sincerely wish for yourself:

May I be healthy.
May I be happy.
May I be safe and free from all harm.
May I be peaceful.

Bring to mind the part of yourself that may have had some difficult moments today. Treat it as a dear friend and wish:

May I be happy.
May I be healthy.
May I be safe and free from all harm.
May I be peaceful.

Days like this are possible because we've all come together and supported one another. Looking around and seeing each other sincerely working with this, we can extend these same wishes to one another:

May you be healthy.
May you be happy.
May you be safe and free from all harm.
May you be peaceful.

Taking all the benefit we've experienced today, we can wish it for the world around us. May this practice ripple out and benefit those close to us and strangers whom we don't know. Dedicating the benefit of this practice to all people and creatures:

May all beings be healthy.
May all beings be happy.
May all beings be safe and free from harm.
May all beings be peaceful and free.

Thank you so much. A big thank you from our hearts to you on YouTube. We look forward to being with you again.