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Mindfulness of Breathing (8) Four Dimensions of Breathing

So we'll continue now with this topic of the Buddha's 16 stages of mindfulness of breathing.

I want to repeat something I said at the beginning of the guided meditation: to really appreciate the value of how breathing sits at the crossroads of so much of our lives, and acts as such a valuable reference point for understanding our lives, it really helps to delve deeply into it or rest deeply in the experience of breathing. This is why the deeper we go, or the more concentrated we become in this mindfulness of breathing, the more it brings processes together and opens up so many different areas and aspects of our life. Breathing, in a sense, is a microcosm to understanding the rest of our lives.

There are many dimensions to the experience of breathing. The four that I mentioned are what I call the vertical dimension, the horizontal dimension, the time dimension, and the mind dimension.

The vertical dimension is the spread of sensations throughout the body that relate to breathing. As the body moves, as the diaphragm moves and the lungs fill with oxygen and then let the air out, there are movements in the body. To be connected to those movements, and the places where there is no movement, where things are held or where maybe there is resistance, is to feel the whole impact of breathing in a particular moment, anywhere you might experience it. I call that the vertical dimension.

The horizontal dimension is to become aware of the sensations of breathing in the body in a deeper, fuller way. It is really having an intimacy with it, like you're feeling fully each of the particular sensations that come into play. This happens not because we're straining to do so, but because we become more and more receptive, and it just comes to us and shows itself more and more. This is the sensation dimension; it's kind of a sensory awareness exercise. We're not following the air or the breath itself, even though we might use that language. In Vipassana^[1], it's really the sensations of breathing that we're receiving, taking in, and experiencing.

Then there is the time dimension, where we want to be able to follow the experience of breathing through time. This involves the continuity of attention, an unbroken appreciation of the breath, unbroken by the mind that pulls us away in distraction. It is this way of staying with the breath through time. If you really do it deeply and well, it's almost like time disappears, even though there's a continuity, we can say, through time—continuity of the whole in-breath and whole out-breath.

If the breathing is fast and rapid, there are hardly any sensations we feel in that period while inhaling and exhaling. We're just aware of whatever is there. It's not wrong to breathe fast and experience almost no sensations; it's just that's the way it is now, and we feel it that way. But as we settle in deeper and deeper and get calmer, the tendency is for the breathing to slow down. As it slows, there's more time to experience one inhale and one exhale.

When I was younger, sometimes I took a checklist approach to mindfulness of breathing. I would sometimes use a mental note, noting "rising" or "falling" for breathing in and out. I would do it at the beginning of the inhale like it was a duty. If I said "rising," I felt I had done my job, and then I wouldn't pay attention to the rest of the inhale because I had checked it off. Done that; aware of the inhale. Then I would be aware of the beginning of the exhale. Done that; check it off. Then I'd kind of drift off in thought and hopefully come back soon enough.

What I learned is not to have that checklist approach, not to be content just with a cursory awareness of an in-breath and an out-breath, but to really stay with the whole length of the breath. Sometimes it's a feeling that I'm staying with it, and sometimes it's more the feeling that it's staying with me, or that I'm just receiving it and letting it come. Having both options to play with is appropriate for the different states of mind that we have. Sometimes it's maybe hopeless to stay with the breath unless we direct ourselves to really stay there because the mind is pulling us away so much. Other times, staying with the breath in a directed way is a little bit too forceful, a strain, or a little bit too active. To really relax deeply, it's better to be in receptive mode and to receive it. This continuity of attention through time is the time dimension.

Then there is how we use the mind: directed or receptive, spacious or really intimate and close, or just observing the breath from a distance, or like riding the waves of breathing, or being there at the heart of each sensation. These are all ways of being with the mind. This is the mind dimension, the awareness dimension that comes into play. That is also being worked on, adjusting, or finding its way. Some of that is done consciously, and some of it is done as the whole system adjusts itself as we settle and get concentrated. It's remarkable to watch the changes over time in the mind, the breathing, and the body as we really enter into this depth, tenderness, intimacy, and continuity with breathing.

The Breath Body

This is often called the breath body: to experience the full experience, all the different aspects of breathing. The continuity through time of the whole in-breath, the whole out-breath, feeling it in different parts of the body, feeling how it comes into play. Having a continuity from beginning, middle, and end of the in-breath and out-breath, maybe throughout the body, or maybe in a particular spot.

A spot that I often keep is right around the belly, sometimes just below the belly button, sometimes a little bit above it. It kind of moves and shifts as I get more concentrated. Sometimes my attention and my breathing go up to my chest, and I stay there. My body seems to partly direct where my attention goes; I just follow wherever it seems most predominant or most alive as I'm sitting and meditating. Sometimes I've experienced the whole breath body, and the beautiful experience of expansion and contraction, like bellows maybe, or a balloon being blown up and then being released.

The more that we're familiar with the breath and resting with the breathing, then at some point this experience—the third step of Anapanasati^[2]: "One trains oneself breathing in, experiencing the whole breath body; one trains oneself breathing out, experiencing the whole breath body"—also spills over into parts of your body that are not directly connected to breathing. Partly this is because the more the mind gets settled and less distracted, it's like turning on a light bulb in the mind. The light of awareness gets turned on, and it's ready to shine and take in all the different aspects of present moment experience. One way or the other, over time, people become more and more aware of more of their body.

If you're a beginner to all this, sometimes it's because the body is uncomfortable, and you start feeling the tensions of the body. There's a way in which the more subtle we become, and the more awareness gets turned on—and we're more sensitive, feeling our whole psychophysical system better—we become more and more aware of the tensions and the holding patterns in the body. Rather than being upset about that, I'd encourage you to feel grateful. It's much better to know you have tension than to have tension and not really know it. It's much better to really feel it and be present for it than it is to ignore it.

Even though it's uncomfortable, the art of meditation and the art of breath meditation is learning how to include the whole embodied experience as part of this breath meditation. So we become more and more embodied as we breathe. Then, as practice deepens, the body begins to recede. There's a period of time where the body becomes very embodied and full, and then the body gets lighter and just recedes from the central focus, compared to how it can be at the beginning.

So whether it's the guided tour of the breath we did yesterday and that whole experience of breathing everywhere in the body, or the continuity through time and that breath body that's continuous through time, these are all different dimensions. But whatever you're doing, I hope you enjoy it, or have the idea in the back of your mind that this is not meant to be grim or pushing.

No Failure in Meditation

Keep in mind that there is no failure with mindfulness of breathing. You can't fail; you can't do it wrong. So don't bother judging it or comparing yourself. The worst that can happen, maybe, is that your mind drifts off a lot and you're going to hardly be with your breathing. But the point is not really to be with your breathing; the point is to be aware of what's really happening here in the present moment.

If you become much more aware of the power of the mind to wander off in thought because you're trying to stay with your breathing, then the meditation has succeeded. If you're able to stay with the breath through time, then the meditation has succeeded. As long as you're aware of what's happening and notice what's happening, then it's a success.

If you drift off in thought and are so lost in thought that you don't even know you're lost in thought, then there's no problem; you're too lost to know. And as soon as you wake up from that and you're aware that you have been lost in thought, there's no problem anymore because now you're aware.

So I like to say there are no problems in meditation; you can't do it wrong. If you're in the present moment and judge yourself—"I'm doing it wrong"—at that moment you have enough wherewithal to simply be aware. Because without that simple awareness, you wouldn't have made that judgment.

So that's my little plug to try to enjoy it. Don't take it all too seriously, settle in, and become more and more interested in your breath and your breathing.

As I said yesterday and before, you would benefit a lot in your meditation if you make it a regular thing throughout your day. Every day, whenever you can, check in with your breathing. Do a three-minute meditation, or a three-breath meditation, or sitting at a traffic light, meditate on your breathing. Just look for lots of opportunities to come back to your breathing. It becomes more and more of a habit to do so. And by doing that, all you're learning about mindfulness of breathing and meditation will actually come and benefit your life tremendously.

So thank you all very much.