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Happy Hour: Metta & Ease

Introduction

For tonight's practice, I thought we would practice some simple Metta^[1] for ourselves and for others. Just bare-bones, simple, lovely, soothing, calming loving-kindness and warmth.

It's been a cool, chilly, windy, and dry day here in California. Some warmth in our hearts, wherever you are, however the weather is internally and externally, can be helpful. We can never have too much Metta—kindness, warmth for ourselves, and care for others.

That's all I want to say to frame it. There's not much framing I want to do, other than to dedicate the time to practicing together. Let's just meditate together, dear Sangha^[2].

Guided Meditation

Getting into your meditation posture, whatever is comfortable for you to sit or stand in for the next half hour or so.

Landing in this body. Landing in this moment in time. Here.

Inviting your muscles to relax and rest. As if they're falling, dropping. Nowhere to go, nothing to do. They can relax. Your heart can relax in this moment. There have been thoughts, entanglements, worries. It's okay, they can all be there. We'll return to them later. But now, taking refuge in this moment. Taking refuge.

If it's supportive for you, maybe you have this feeling or image as if you were a pre-verbal baby being held in the caring arms of a loving mother. Just being held. Feeling that you're held and feeling safe. The cells of your body know what it's like. You don't have to think about it. Please don't think about it. Don't start thinking about your childhood, this and that. Drop all that.

Trusting that your body and your heart know what it's like to be held and feel safe. As if you're held like a baby, feeling safe. It's a feeling that's available to you to conjure up. We can't conjure it up? Of course you can. Being held right now. The air is holding you. Your clothes are holding you, embracing you. Here, there.

Just be and breathe, or let yourself be breathed. Just let it unfold. No struggling, no doing, no trying. It can be easy. Drop, let go of trying too hard in this moment. Let go.

Let your mind rest. Be at peace, be at ease. Resting with the lullaby of the breath. When the mind is happy, it stays; it doesn't run around. Let your mind feel cocooned. Resting with the sweet in-breath and out-breath.

If your mind wanders to thoughts and entanglements, it's okay. Tell it, "It's okay, sweetheart. It's all right, darling." Ever so gently inviting you to rest with your heart and with the breath. To take refuge, knowing that there is more sweetness, more rest, and more nourishment here than any thought, no matter how pleasant it might be. It's still entanglement. Trusting there's more nourishment and more sweetness here. Inviting awareness to rest here, darling. Right here.

Maybe imagining that the breath is entering through the heart center, the center of your chest. Calming, soothing, like a healing salve for the body, the heart, and the mind. With each breath, awareness is intertwined. Awareness cuddling in the heart center with the breath. With kindness and care for this entire being that is you, this whole body, mind, and heart. Very simple, relaxed, easy, and peaceful.

See what is needed in this moment. If you've had a long day, maybe a hard day, maybe the warm healing embrace of Metta in this quiet. If you're feeling weary, maybe Metta feels like a strength. Both soothing and giving you strength, confidence, and support. See what is needed in each breath, imbued with care. Or maybe simply quiet is needed for whatever needs to unfold.

And again, if you find thoughts arising, it's okay. Be gentle with yourself. Be gentle with your heart and your mind. Releasing the body, releasing the thoughts. Let there be a resting sense of cocooning with the breath, with kindness. Taking a break, taking a rest. Trusting that resting in care, love, and Metta brings solace, comfort, and strength in ways that are needed, without needing to solve a problem right now. Trusting that a different, kinder mind will arise later. Just stay here. The heart with the breath and the body.

Now, as if you would open the door and just let one or two beings in who are dear to you. It could be a child, a pet, a good friend, or a benefactor. In this easy place of rest, as you are cocooning, let them rest. Invite them to rest in your mind's eye. As you hold yourself with ease and kindness, let them be included also.

May all of us have ease. May all of us have well-being and easefulness in how our lives unfold. Happiness. Goodness. Let it be easeful. It's not that you're pumping out goodwill or Metta. It's the breath you take, the air you breathe. The air that holds you, and others in your mind's eye. It's the cushion you rest on, and them too. A sense of care, a palpable ease. Easy kindness.

Trusting that you're planting seeds of kindness and goodwill meant for yourself and others. It doesn't have to feel like hard work. It can be gentle, easy, flowing, and soothing. Metta can grow and glow with contentment and peace in the heart, planting seeds one by one.

As we bring this practice period to a close, let there be kindness and ease for whatever arose or did not arise. If there was agitation, sleepiness, or distraction, it's okay. If there was one moment of awareness and mental kindness—which could be this moment—it's okay. I showed up. I planted seeds, and that's enough.

Celebrate and really relish that we've come together. You've showed up to practice, to cultivate your heart and mind in this brief flash of a life. What a beautiful way to spend, to intend to spend your time. Offering the goodness. Trusting there is goodness and offering it generously to all beings everywhere. Offering my practice, our collective practice, as a gift to all beings here.

I offer my goodness to you, dear world. May all of us beings be free. May we be happy.

Reflections and Q&A

Thank you all. Thank you for your practice.

We have some time for questions or reflections. If something came up and you are moved to share, I'd like to invite you to share for the benefit of everyone. Maybe an aha moment, maybe something new showed up for you, or maybe it was challenging. It's all okay and all welcome. Any questions or comments on this way of Metta for ourselves as a way of cocooning, feeling held in care and safety, just easy with the breath, and then extending it to a couple of other beings who are dear to us?

You're welcome to send messages to me directly, in which case it will be private, or send it to everyone, in which case I'll read your name. You can also raise your hand, as always. As I'm waiting to see if there are any observations you want to share, I'll say that I found this evening's practice quite quieting. A lot of Samadhi^[3], a lot of stillness with the sense of soothing.

I see Mima's hand. Mima?

Mima: Hi Nikki, thank you. I was moved right away when you first started because when you said to nurture myself, to hold myself, that the air was holding me... I was really moved by that. I think I really needed it. It's been a really hard day, and I had never experienced that before. It just felt really good to do me, you know, instead of doing for everyone else. I got to do me. I had a headache all day, and it went away, so it must have been tension. It's just gone, so I'm really relaxed. Thank you.

Nikki: You are so welcome. Even that makes me so happy, that your headache is gone. Come to Dr. Nikki anytime, I'll prescribe Metta for you. That's very sweet. Thanks so much for sharing that. It makes my heart happy.

Kenneth says, "Resting the mind on the breath worked well for me." Great, lovely.

Are there any other reflections you'd like to share? Aha moments, challenges, or how good it felt to hold yourself and be held with Metta here? This being who is me is so needed. And if you're quiet, that's okay too. This was kind of a quieting meditation, like I noticed, so we can just be quiet together. That's okay too, holding each other in kindness. Rather sweet. I'll put everyone on gallery view.

Dave says, "I feel like a sleepy kid being carried from car to house to bed." Oh, that's such a sweet image, Dave. I love that. It's so sweet.

I see someone giving a thumbs up. I wasn't sure if that was just a thumbs up or if you're trying to raise your hand. If you want to raise your hand, use the actual "raise hand" button just in case.

Pat on YouTube says, "Thank you for the quiet simplicity, especially at the end of the day." You're so welcome.

Pepper says, "I came to the meditation feeling so depleted and have felt that way all day after kind of overdoing it over the weekend. This was needed medicine. Thanks Nikki." Thank you, Debra, and you're so welcome.

Metta is medicine, isn't it? Metta is medicine. This kindness, soothing, and easing. Not pushing it out, not even needing phrases, just being held. If the phrases work for you, great, use them and bring them in. But if not, it's okay.

Here is one more reflection sent privately to me: "I connected the practice to moments in my life that scare me and was able to feel how safety in those situations can be possible. I felt it in my body. Perhaps this will be a new way to experience scary situations with these connections wired."

Oh, wow. Lovely! My heart is filled with joy. It is beautiful to make that connection. That is so profound, to be able to feel how safety in those scary situations can be possible. Thank you so much for sharing that insight. It is perfect and profound. And it is possible, even and especially in scary moments. The Buddha originally taught Metta to monks because they were scared; they had fear. So this is supposed to be medicine for scary and fearful times, so that we feel safe. Beautiful.

Marianne says, "I felt like I was very well, and so it became a time to turn to wishing love to all of you." That's sweet. Thanks, Marianne, it's so lovely. I love that insight you're sharing experientially, that when you felt very well, your cup was full^[4]. "Yes, my cup is full. Now I can fill other people's cups. I can turn and wish them well." It is so beautiful to experience that.

Megan says, "I love thinking about Metta as medicine." Yes, Megan, absolutely. Especially with you being a healer and healthcare professional. Indeed, Metta is medicine.

Mary says, "I really appreciate the reminder not to go to the story of my own childhood, but to stay here."

Lovely. All these beautiful insights from you all. This is so touching; my heart is full with your practice. Thank you for offering your practice, your goodness, your beauty, and your insights.

Breakout Rooms and Closing

Offering our goodness and our practice to each other, let us hold each other with a sense of ease, calm, and safety for ourselves and for each other in small groups.

As I set them up, please take care of yourself. Speak whatever you want to share—a nugget from your own experience only. Then let a second person share a nugget from their experience, and then the third person. It will come back to you, and you'll go around and round a few times. Be kind, holding each other and holding yourselves.

I see something came in from Christine as I'm setting up the breakout rooms. Wow, I love that. Christine says, "Question posted to my local Sangha yesterday that I've been pondering in my heart: What kind of love can I give myself today that would set me free a little bit more?"

I love that. What a nice question. Let's take that question to our small practice rooms. You can either answer that in this moment, or sit together and share anything you'd like to share from the practice that came up for you. Or maybe just hold silence. You can also say "pass" if your turn comes and you want to be quiet. That's perfectly fine.

I'm going to open the rooms. Take care of yourselves, take care of each other. Here we go.

[Breakout rooms commence and conclude]

The rooms are closed. Welcome back, everyone.

We had such lovely reflections at the beginning that there isn't much time for anything more. But if there's a quick thing you want to write in chat, maybe a gift that came from the groups, you're welcome to, and I'll read it out loud. I'll pause for a moment to see if something very quick came up in the group that just feels appropriate and must be shared.

Going once, going twice.

Okay, it seems like it feels complete. So with that, thank you all for your practice, for coming together, supporting each other, and supporting yourselves. May we all be happy and free. May all beings everywhere be happy and free. Thanks everyone. Thanks, dear Sangha. Be well.