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Happy Hour: Appreciation/Metta for the Body in Any State of Health

Hello and a warm-hearted welcome, wherever you are and however the weather is, either internally in this moment or externally.

For today's practice and the theme of our exploration, I'd like to invite us to explore the wish for health. As part of the phrases of metta^[1], we cultivate loving-kindness for ourselves and for others, tapping into the goodwill that we have for ourselves and the world.

To review the four phrases of metta: the first one has to do with safety, which we talked about last week. The second one has to do with mental happiness, and we explored that on Monday. Today, we explore the third phrase, and we will linger a little bit here today: May you be healthy. Let's explore that wish. On Friday, we will explore the last wish, which is for ease, or maybe there will be more about health to explore. We will see.

This third metta phrase—May you be healthy, may you be strong. May I be healthy, may I be strong—is a wish for physical well-being. Let's sit with that. Consider that these different phrases of metta explore different aspects of well-being: mental well-being, safety, and so on. Regarding physical well-being and health, as human beings, we all have a body. Of course we do. And we all experience a lack of health because we have a body. We have been sick, or we will be sick, or maybe we are sick right now. We all age; it is a part of life.

So this wish for physical well-being is an offer. It is a gift of generosity, regardless of how much health we have, or other people have, in this moment.

Actually, it is interesting that I am talking about this theme today because I haven't been feeling well all day. I have been horizontal, and I will probably be horizontal again after teaching. It is actually perfect. I realize there is no irony; there is a perfection in talking about this wish for health, where there can be well-being that holds a lack of physical well-being. There can be a sense of well-being in the heart and the mind that holds the lack of physical health. I invite us to explore that aspect: well-being is greater and more pervasive. You could be sick and not feel well, but there can still be an overall sense of well-being that holds that lack of physical health in the moment. That is one possibility to drop in.

Another theme to explore is that health, or the lack of it, is always relative. It is not binary. As long as we are alive, there is some level of health, some level of something that is working. The heart is beating; we are breathing. So, for example, if you are wishing yourself, May I be healthy, or wishing someone you care about, May you be healthy, and they are not fully healthy, it is not ironic to wish, May you be healthy as much as possible, as much as is available.

The goal is not to try to push reality away or fight with it, not to be in conflict, but to offer this wish. Another aspect of cultivating metta and friendliness is that we cultivate our heart in goodness and generosity for ourselves and others with this offering: May you be healthy as much as possible, as much as is available to you. May I be healthy. May I have good health as much as possible. There is a delight in that. Just as I say that today, as I am not feeling well, there is a generosity in it. It is not fighting reality; there is a grace and a beauty even when there is a lack of health to have this wish for ourselves and others.

One last contemplation I want to bring in today is that there is, of course, a great gift in being healthy. We already know this; it is obvious and apparent. But many of us don't open up to the grace, beauty, and value of not being fully healthy. There is a place where we can go inside and open up to the inner world, as long as we work with the second arrows^[2]. The teaching of the first arrow is the lack of health itself. The second arrow is what we add to it: Oh, I don't want to be here. This is terrible. I'll never be well. I have a lot of things on my to-do list. As we work with those reactions, we can actually allow the relishing of going inward, of letting go. There is a quietness of mind, a solitude, a sense of peace that is forced, yet it is an opportunity.

In fact, on many retreats, I have given the instruction to practice as if you are sick right now. When you are sick, that sense of grabbing, grasping, clinging, and wanting kind of drops away. The mind doesn't have the energy to fight too much. There is a sense of ease that naturally comes in when there isn't so much grasping.

There is so much to explore in health and the lack of it. The invitation is to explore this offering, this wish for health, and play with it for others and for ourselves, as much as is available, in a nuanced way. Let's be open to all the dimensions this can open up for us, perhaps in ways we didn't quite expect.

Guided Meditation

I would like to invite us all to get into our meditation posture. Landing in the body, either sitting or lying down, whatever is appropriate for you.

Greeting this body however it is feeling right now. Inviting the body to be just as it is. Whether it's feeling energetic, healthy, and vibrant, or feeling tired, lacking energy, or unwell. However it is: hello, dear body. Hi.

Greet it as if you are greeting a dear, dear friend whom you have ignored. A friend who is doing their best. Who has done their best. Maybe you've been a taskmaster to this friend, telling them to keep performing, cracking the whip. Greet this dear friend who has been doing the best they can in this moment, given all the causes and conditions. This dear friend continues to work as hard and as best as they can right now.

Breathing. Appreciating that this body is breathing. Doing it on its own. Thank you very much. You don't need to force it or do anything intentionally. Just lovingly appreciating that the breath is breathing itself. The body, breathing. The heart, beating.

Inviting this friend, your body, to relax, to soften. It doesn't have to do anything right now. It has worked hard enough all day. As the breath is perceived, one breath at a time, let there be a sense of appreciation, love, and care for this hard-working friend. Putting down the whip. Oh sweetheart, dear body. I have forsaken you, ignored you, been demanding. May you be well. May you be healthy, dear body, as much as possible.

We can go through different parts of the body, wishing well, appreciating, offering a sense of metta, care, and love for different body parts.

Feet. Dear feet, thank you. You have walked many steps today. So many muscles, so many bones, who have been acting and working together. Thank you. May you be well.

Showering your lower legs and upper legs, your knees, with appreciation, care, and goodwill. Thank you for all you do, all you've done. I wish you well. May you be healthy, dear legs and feet. Offer this not in a grasping way, but as a blessing unto your own body without attachment to outcomes. As a cultivation of appreciation, goodwill, friendliness, and care.

Appreciating your sit bones, your groin area, your lower abdomen, with appreciation and care for their function. As best as possible, wishing them well.

Appreciating the abdomen and all the organs. Stomach, intestines, kidneys, liver. So many organs. Appreciating and thanking them. May you be well, dear organs. Supporting me, supporting this life, this consciousness, as best as you're able to given the causes and conditions.

Appreciating the chest. All the muscles and bones. The heart, pumping blood. The lungs. Thank you, you've been working all day miraculously. Thank you. I wish you well, dear organs. Both mine and not mine—we don't exactly choose our organs; we just find ourselves in this body when we are born. Oh, dear organs, thank you. May you be well.

Appreciating our arms, elbows, our hands, our fingers, our digits, our thumbs. Oh, they have done so much today. They have moved, they have fed us, they have worked. Wow. Thank you. Appreciation, gratitude, friendliness, metta. Thank you, dear friends. Thank you, team. May you be well.

Our neck and shoulders, holding up our heavy head. Thank you. May you be well. Thank you for functioning as well as you've been able to.

And appreciating the head and all its organs. The brain, eyes, ears, nose, tongue, mouth. So many functions. So many interrelated functions. Thank you for helping this being who is me to see, hear, speak, smell, think, and function today. Deep appreciation, metta, and goodwill. May you be well, all you organs.

May all the organs of this body, all the flesh, all the muscles, all the bones, the sinew, the nerves, the tendons... thank you, thank you. Extraordinary. Thank you. I love you, I wish you well. May you be healthy.

May all parts of this body, I wish them well. May they be healthy. May this body as a whole be as healthy as possible, as is available. Appreciating the health, the well-being that is available already.

May I be healthy and strong.

Offering the wish to all the parts of your body as a gift of generosity. If it works for you to say, May you be healthy, or Dear body parts, you can do that too. See what conception works best, what ways of seeing.

If you'd like to experiment with putting your palm on your heart center, in the middle of your chest, connect with this body connecting with itself. May this body be healthy. May I be healthy. Sharing goodwill and friendliness. May I be healthy. May I be healthy and strong. Letting the goodness of that wish land as a blessing.

Now, turning that wish and shining that blessing externally. Choosing one person, one practice partner, maybe in this room, or someone you've practiced with before, or a friend. May you be healthy. Sharing this blessing of goodwill for their health, for their body. May your body have the gift of well-being as much as possible. May you be healthy and strong. May we both have the blessing of health and well-being. May both of our bodies be healthy and strong as much as possible.

Sharing the wish internally and externally. May all beings everywhere be healthy and strong. May their bodies support them in this life.

Reflections

Thank you for your practice, everyone.

The wish for health has so much to explore. I feel like we have just scratched the surface. One invitation, as I guided us in this practice, was to appreciate the body part by part. We take ourselves for granted. The body works as hard and as best as it can. We notice when something goes wrong, but so many things are going right to appreciate. That is the sense of metta, goodwill, and friendliness for ourselves.

There is much more I can say, but let me invite you to share your reflections. What did you notice? What came up in this practice for you?

Ally: "I just really got present to how much I've learned to co-create with my body this last year, and all that we've been through together. It really just hit me that I've stopped going to war with it. Just how loyal it is... it's a miracle and it's humbling. It was really profound for me."

Nikki: I am so touched. The way you put it, that you stopped going to war with it—that's powerful. That realization, that shift in attitude. Not going to war with our bodies. It is so common to do that. Especially when we get sick, that's the hardest time. We think, Why are you not performing? Why are you not getting better? You have betrayed me. Instead of, Oh sweetheart, you've been working so well this whole time, thank you. Is there anything particular that has brought this shift, any insight you'd like to share?

Ally: "I hit the rock bottom of my life in just about every way, and self-trust was built because I had nowhere else to go. My body was there. It was the only thing that was really there with me and knows what it was like to walk in my shoes. When you really think about all the things that you walk through in your life, and the body witnessing, holding, and taking care in ways that we can't on such micro and macro levels... it's incredible."

Nikki: That is profound. How this wisdom also came from so much suffering. Thank you for sharing.

Claire: "I put my hand up when Ally used the word 'co-create' because it brought a whole new perspective for me, and it reflects on my own experience. I happen to be unusually healthy—it's a great gift—but since before I was a teenager, I started to treat my body as though it was a very special friend that I should be very loving toward. I am now sugar-free, alcohol-free, tobacco-free. I work out, I've studied nutrition, I take vitamins... I treat it like it's special. I definitely co-create. I know I need it, and I'm really good to it, and it works, and I'm grateful it works."

Nikki: Beautiful. I love you expanding on what Ally brought in with this co-creation. Oh, darling body, I'm going to be good to you and you'll be good to me. I'll be patient with you, you'll be patient with me. This is tremendous. Thank you, Claire.

Jerry in the chat says: "It's helped to recognize the inherent negativity bias of focusing on one or more aspects of the body that are not working the best, rather than being grateful for all the rest of the body working, so you get a more wholesome perspective." Thank you for that, absolutely.

And SP on YouTube says: "So refreshing to get windows of metta through the sit. I've been swept away often in afflictive states and feel far from brahmaviharas^[3], really longing to abide in metta and wisdom." Thank you so much for that.

Dear ones, let's turn our practice, and this wish for health and well-being, externally towards the people we see. These lovely beings who support us, who practice with us. This is where the rubber meets the road. What is it like to show up in that way, wishing for their well-being, and co-creating this space for each other? Let's go into our breakout rooms.

[Breakout rooms commence and return]

Welcome back, everyone. We have a couple of minutes for any reflections or anything you noticed in group practice.

Susan: "I was telling my group members, this is so healing. Oh my gosh, what a boon. In the beginning of the year, a lot of my organs started failing or having massive problems, and I was kind of preparing myself for dying for a while there. But it seems like I'm turning the corner, and so this is right up my alley today. I got a lot out of everybody's shares as well. Nikki, thanks tons."

Nikki: Thank you, Susan, and thank you to all of Susan's organs and body parts for supporting her as well as possible. This is profound what you shared. Thank you for being here, sharing yourself, and practicing with everyone.

I think that is a profound note to end on. Thank you all for being here, for giving your heart to this practice, supporting yourselves, supporting others, and the world. May all beings be healthy and strong as much as possible. May all beings be free, including ourselves. Thanks, everyone.