This is an AI-generated transcript from auto-generated subtitles for the video above. It likely contains inaccuracies, especially with speaker attribution if there are multiple speakers.

Guided Meditation: What's truly lacking?

Good evening, good evening. Welcome, welcome. Nice to be here.

So we'll start with a guided meditation as a way to support our practice and to support our being here now. So taking our meditation posture, and having the body in a posture that expresses our intention to meditate, and also has some ease, has a certain amount of relaxation. And then tuning into the body as it is at this moment. Maybe in a global sense feeling tired or restless, agitated or calm, happy, sad. Maybe we're not sure. And then tuning in to some more particular experiences. The pressure against the body of whatever we're sitting on. On our lower legs, our buttocks, our back, perhaps our feet. We're here now.

And then allowing the attention to land on the experience of breathing. Feeling the movements of the body associated with breathing. The chest, the abdomen. It's subtle, but we might also notice a little bit in our back, or perhaps the feeling of air going in and out of the nose. In a relaxed, easy way, without straining. Just noticing the sensations of breathing.

And when the mind wanders—of course the mind will wander—and when it does, we just very simply, gently begin again.

And when the mind wanders, we might notice that sometimes there is a wish for something more. Sometimes it might be planning what we're going to do or obtain. Or we might be imagining how it would be so much better if only...

And when we find our mind lost and pulled in this direction, we might just use a little query, ask ourselves: what in this moment is truly lacking? In the spirit of, can we bring our attention back to this moment and the fullness, the completeness of this moment, as opposed to focusing on what's absent or what's not matching our preferences? At this moment, is anything truly lacking? Maybe you'll have to modify the question in a way that resonates with you. Does there have to be this sense of lack, this sense of not enough?

If it feels too complicated, too burdensome, to be noticing when we're wishing things to be different or planning what we're going to obtain or acquire or do next, and then responding with the question, "What's really lacking? What's truly lacking? Is anything lacking that's really important?" And if all of that feels too burdensome, just being with the sensations of breathing.

We're approaching our meditation in this way to help support a sense of, "it's okay in this moment." We don't have to have... we don't absolutely have to have these things that we're thinking about or planning for. Right now, we're just here meditating.

Sometimes we have a sense that we just need more. Maybe we're not even clear more of what, but can we settle into this moment and let go of the idea that we need to have more? And instead to notice the fullness, the completeness of what's here right now.

So much harm gets created, sometimes very subtle, but harm for ourselves, for others, by our always looking, wanting more. When we put that down, it not only supports us, but supports others by our not demanding things from others, and supports our communities, our planet, if we can quiet, abate the wanting-more mind. So that in this way, our practice can be a support not only for ourselves, but for others on the planet, for everyone.

So may all beings be free from suffering and the causes of suffering. Thank you.

Renunciation as a Support

Welcome, welcome. Warm welcome wherever you are. Sometimes it's fun for me to imagine there might be a time in the future when somebody hears this. Even myself, sometimes I want to remind myself of what I've said in talks, so sometimes I even listen to these things years in the future. Whenever it is, welcome.

So all of us, whether it's explicit or implicit, whether it's obvious or we state it out loud, or whether it's just kind of in the back of our minds propelling us, we all have some goals. Some achievements, maybe we could say, or some things we'd like to have in our lifetime.

And in Buddhist practice, in early Buddhism, there's this idea that we can lose the goal of awakening, to be enlightened. And maybe in another talk I'll talk about some of the wisdom of that goal and how to hold on to it, and maybe how some of the other Buddhist traditions approach it may be a little bit different. But putting that aside for now, I'll assume that we all have this goal, whether it's implicit or explicit, to have more freedom, more peace, more ease, more well-being.

The fact is that most of us come to this practice because we have a lot of dukkha^[1]. We have a lot of suffering. We have something other than freedom, other than peace, other than ease. So we come here and do these practices with the intention of increasing, if not just abiding in wellness, increasing the sense of okayness in our lives. And so we might ask, well, how can we achieve this more freedom, more peace, more ease? Part of it, of course, is a meditation practice. But how can we achieve our goals?

I heard a talk recently from James Clear, a bestselling author, where he stated, "We don't rise to our goals, we fall to our systems." We don't rise to our goals, we fall to our systems. That kind of struck me, maybe it had a certain resonance that just because we have goals doesn't mean that pulls us up and helps us to achieve them. We fall to our systems. I haven't read this book by James Clear, so I'm just basing all of this on these little snippets I've heard, so I'm filling in all the details just according to my interpretation. But this idea that we fall to our systems means, in my mind, that when we're under stress or what we do repeatedly over and over, that's what creates the conditions for the outcomes that we're going to experience. So that just because we might have a goal, if we don't have the systems in place that are consistent with that goal, then it's not so likely that we'll meet it.

Maybe this is obvious and goes without saying. Maybe I also say that something very much that I appreciate about Buddhist practice is that this goal of freedom, and so much about the practice is finding freedom, and the way that we approach our experiences, and the way that we frame, interpret our experiences, the things that we do, things that we say. So we might ask, if James Clear is saying, "We don't rise to our goals, we fall to our systems," well what, what are our systems? And I was thinking about this in terms of this Buddhist practice.

Oh, maybe before I do say that, I'll say a little bit more about something that James Clear says. He tells this story which I thought was quite remarkable, and I'll share it with you, and perhaps you've heard this story elsewhere or already know about this. He tells the story of the British cycling team, and they had hired a new performance director. I guess the British cycling team back in the 1990s and before hadn't done well in the Tour de France for over 100 years. They hadn't won it and didn't do very well in the Olympics. In fact, I think he says that some well-known bicycle brand refused to sell bikes to the British team because they didn't want their brand of bicycle to be associated with this team. So, okay, I guess they were pretty bad.

So they hire this new performance director who says, "Okay, we're just going to do one percent improvement. We're just going to look for a tiny, small little improvement in lots of different places." So the way the story that James Clear tells is they did all the obvious ones, you know, lighter tires and making sure that their bikes are in tip-top shape, I guess, but included things like changing their jerseys to some that are a little bit more lightweight, a little bit more aerodynamic. But then he said that they also made these little one percent improvements in places that you wouldn't expect, such as asking all the athletes to try out a lot of different pillows and which pillow did they sleep the best with, and then they would take this particular pillow with them when they had to travel to compete. And then they hired some surgeon to come in and to demonstrate the right way to wash your hands. Maybe all of us after coming through this pandemic, we know how to wash our hands, 20 seconds, warm water, but maybe back then to really make sure they knew how to wash their hands to make it less likely that they would get a cold or get a flu. And I guess they have these big giant trucks that carry all the bicycles, and they painted the inside of it white so that they could see if there's any dirt and clean it all up so that the bikes would always remain clean and not have anything that would jam up the gears, so to speak. So one percent, these little bits of changes in all these different areas. And then the prediction was made by this performance director that they should be able to win the Tour de France in five years if they just consistently were making these one percent changes.

And I guess this turned out not to be true, but in fact, it only took three years to win the Tour de France. And then I guess the British cycling team was just a force to be reckoned with and did really well at the Olympics. So it wasn't only the Tour de France, it was the Olympics, the women's cycling team, the men's cycling team. So I just think this is a powerful story, because I'm sure everybody who enters the Tour de France, I'm sure every single cycling team has the same goal to win, but what systems do they have?

So I got to thinking about, you know, which systems do we have in our practice, in Buddhist practice? Some of them are obvious, but one I'd like to suggest are the pāramīs^[2]. I've been giving a series of talks on the pāramīs, and the first is generosity. Just this movement of the heart, and maybe the movement actually of the hands too, but to not be stingy, but instead to share. Whether it's resources or time, or giving people the benefit of the doubt, part of that's kind of a system we might have in our life. It's this movement towards generosity as opposed to kind of grabbing and holding on, and stinginess.

The second pāramī is ethics. That is to behave in a way that creates the conditions for more well-being, not only for ourselves but for others. To follow these precepts that the Buddha offered as a way to help support our practice, help support our lives. And as I spoke about in the talk about ethics, we can use ethics not only as a guideline for how we should behave, but also as an indicator for ourselves of when are we tempted to, or considering to not behave ethically. What is going on in our lives, what's going on in our minds that makes us think that it's a good idea to behave unethically?

And then the third one is renunciation. So this idea of renunciation is a system that we have, that is, it's kind of the opposite movement of acquiring, acquiring, acquiring. Or it's the opposite movement of following every single desire that we have and obtaining or satisfying every desire without any thought of whether it's wholesome or worthwhile or helps bring us closer to our goals or is in alignment with what's important for us.

So the pāramīs are one set of systems, and I'm going to talk a little bit more about them, but we could also think about... just one way is this idea of systems or habits. What are some of the habits that we have in our lives? James Clear is a bestselling author, and the title of his book is Atomic Habits, and I guess it's been number one on the New York Times bestselling list for a while.

What habits do we have? We also have our beliefs. Maybe our belief that it's a scary place out there, or not. Our belief that people are intrinsically good, or they're always trying to trick us, or you know, some kind of our beliefs are also maybe some of our systems. Our habits of thought, our habits of interpretation.

Also our intentions, we could think of as our system. We all know that Right Intention is part of the Eightfold Path, it's the second step. And Right Intention, that is, what is underlying our actions, what direction do we want to go? Right Intention highlights that if we want to have some freedom, achieve our goal of awakening, liberation, more ease, more peace, to have the intention for non-lust, non-greed, non-hatred, and non-harming. Because this recognition that lust and hatred and harming ourselves or others is not going to support our going where we want to go.

So of course another way that we could say one of these intentions, non-lust, non-greed, is renunciation. It's part of an intention. And then just for completeness I'll say that also goodwill and harmlessness are the other parts of our Right Intention.

So maybe I'll share this quote to kind of unpack a little bit what this means, renunciation. Because most of us, we hear this word and it's not a warm fuzzy feeling. We have this feeling maybe that it's going to be about denial or... somehow the word now just slips my mind. So I'll just go to the next thing here. Here's a sutta^[3] reference, and I'll set it up.

There's this monk who is often, when he's meditating, off in the woods or in an empty hut by himself, he's saying to himself, "Oh, what bliss! Oh, what bliss!" So apparently he's really happy, and he's just saying out loud, "Oh, what bliss!" And the other monks hear him saying this, and the other monks are talking amongst themselves and they say, "Oh, without a doubt, Venerable Bhaddiya^[4] over here, he must be dissatisfied with the renunciant life, being a monastic. Because it must be that when he's remembering the pleasures of royalty he formerly enjoyed that he's frequently saying, 'Oh, what bliss! Oh, what bliss!'"

So this monk used to be a king, and now he's a monastic and he's meditating. And apparently he's really happy, and everybody else is assuming, maybe because the sutta doesn't say this, I'm imagining that he's annoying them or disturbing them because he's so happy and meditating, he keeps on saying "Oh, what bliss!"

So the monks go to the Buddha and they say, "Venerable Bhaddiya over here is always saying 'Oh, what bliss!' all the time." And the Buddha says, "Okay, bring him to me." So Venerable Bhaddiya comes to the Buddha, and the Buddha says, "Is it true that you're saying 'Oh, what bliss!' all the time while you're meditating?" And he says, "Yes, sir, yes Venerable sir." And the Buddha asks, "Why?"

So here we go. Here's what the Buddha says: "Is it really true, Bhaddiya, that even in the wilderness at the foot of a tree or in an empty dwelling, an empty hut, you frequently say 'Oh, what bliss'?" "Yes, sir." "But why do you say this?"

And here's his reason: "Formerly, as a layperson ruling the land, my guard was well organized within and without the royal compound, within and without the city, and within and without the country." So he describes how he was well guarded there at the palace, in the city, and even in the whole country. And he says, "But although I was guarded and defended in this way, I remained fearful and scared and suspicious and nervous. But these days, even when alone in the wilderness, at the foot of a tree, or in an empty dwelling, I'm not fearful, scared, suspicious, or nervous. I live relaxed, unruffled, surviving on charity, and my heart free as a wild deer. It is for this reason that even in the wilderness or at the foot of a tree or in an empty dwelling, I frequently express this heartfelt sentiment: Oh, what bliss! Oh, what bliss!"

So renunciation is pointing to this. A king who has, you know, everything presumably that he could imagine, but still didn't feel quite safe. Partly, having so much, perhaps there's more to lose. But this recognition of that kind of nervousness or the anxiety that's associated with trying to protect so much. So we might have a lot, but then it doesn't necessarily mean that we have more ease. And we all know this. There's a part of us that knows that even as we get more and more and more, it doesn't lead to more and more happiness.

I've told this story before, but it was really powerful. This was years ago, but had a big impact on me. It was when I had just finished graduate school and just had to have a real job, and one thing that I purchased was a jacket that I really liked. It was one of those that I just put on and I just felt good in it. It fit me well, and I just really liked it. It was a little bit too expensive though, but I purchased it anyways, kind of maybe to celebrate, like now I have some income, and I don't remember exactly how I justified it then. So I had this jacket that I would like to wear. But then, oh my gosh, this jacket! You know, clearly I owned the jacket, but it started to own me. I sometimes would have a drink in the car with me when I was driving. "Oh, okay, I can't do that anymore because what if I were to spill and get it on my jacket?" Or if I'm at a restaurant, a cafe, a coffee shop with somebody and I want to take my jacket off, it's too warm, and I put it on the back of the chair. "Oh," then I get nervous. Everybody's walking by, they might, I don't know, spill something on it or something like this. More and more, this just became so burdensome to own this jacket because I couldn't really afford another one.

And so you get my sense here. We all know this, that just acquiring more doesn't mean that things are going to be better. In fact, simplicity is often what supports the most ease and well-being. There's a reason why retreat centers, residential retreat centers, the rooms are really simple. Really simple, small, simple. There's a reason why the schedule is very simple: sit, walk, have a meal, do a yogi job, sit, walk, sit, walk. It's really simple. And I would say for me, this is one thing that I love about being on retreat, is I love just having this small little space, just a few things, and everything is so simple. It allows a sense of freedom, a sense of being unburdened.

So can we reframe when we think of this word renunciation or relinquishment, we can think of it as a system to support awakening, to support more freedom. We can think of it also as maybe we could reframe it as non-addiction. That is, we often use this word addiction, whether we have literal addictions which are serious matters and really bring a lot of suffering to a lot of people, and then sometimes we kind of informally use this word addiction. But these really strong habits that we have attached to behaviors or movements of the mind that don't really serve us, and yet we can't quite stop or we can't disrupt the momentum of them. So if we think of this idea of renunciation as non-addiction, maybe there's a way that we can tease apart and take away some of the energy behind some of these habits we might have that are not supporting us, not helping us, not creating the conditions for more and more freedom.

And the Buddha, when he highlighted in particular kind of our addiction to sensual pleasures, that is things that smell good and taste good and sexual experiences, things that feel good or sound good, particularly music or things like this. And he was highlighting that our never-ending pursuit of one sensual pleasure after another is not the way to the greatest freedom, the greatest happiness. Instead, renunciation is this way of being able to not follow these urges, these desires that we have. And because it was, in my view, because it was so difficult, it's not something that's so easily done, he spoke about it in so many different ways and different settings. But for now I'd like to just maybe say a few words about, well, what can we do with, how might we work with this desire that we have for sensual pleasure? Recognize it. Of course we have this, it's human to have this. And we might even say we kind of evolutionarily inherited this desire for sensual pleasures, good tasting food, pleasurable physical experiences. And so it's definitely, all of us humans have this.

And one way that the Buddha expressed this or pointed to this was the description of these creatures called hungry ghosts. Perhaps you've heard of them. That these creatures with these really big empty stomachs, really big stomachs, and then these really thread-like mouths and necks. So they could only get just a little bit of food or sustenance in this thread-thin mouth and neck, and this big belly would never be satisfied. So these hungry ghosts are perpetually always wanting more. In some ways, the human experience is like this, and intellectually we understand that there might be no way to satisfy this eternally hungry spirit, so to speak, yet we persist. We have this maybe misguided striving to satisfy this never-ending craving. This force of desire is really powerful. It's really powerful.

So what are some things that we might do? One is just to notice how often this pursuit of sensual pleasure is leading us around. What we acquire, what we obtain, what we buy, is it all about pleasurable experiences? How we spend our time, is it all about trying to get that maximized comfort, sometimes at all costs? To be sure, there's nothing wrong with having sensual pleasure. What I'm pointing to is the never-ending, it's never-ending satisfaction, it's never satisfying, it's never enough. This never-ending craving.

So is there a way that we can quiet that craving, quiet it down, subdue it, and be without it? Simplify things. One is to notice. Another is to maybe respond to some of these urges that we have in a skillful way, when we pay attention to them and to notice, "Oh yeah, I really want that." Maybe we could say "No thank you" in our mind. "No thank you." So kind of acknowledging that this urge has arisen, but we're not going to follow it right now. So that could be another way that we might say to ourselves, "Not now," kind of highlighting that there's not necessarily anything inherently bad with what we're desiring, but maybe the time isn't right for us too. Maybe we don't need to eat more food. Maybe we don't need more clothes. Maybe we don't need that other gadget, gizmo, thingamajig.

Or we could ask ourselves, "What in this moment is truly lacking?" Like what, right now? We might be planning in the future we need something, but right now, what's truly lacking?

Or maybe we could say, "This is good enough." It's good enough. Yeah, maybe it would be just a little bit better if I acquired and obtained and got more, but this is good enough. So this is not easy. It's not that we'll do this, you know, five times and then our urges will go away. But if we do these small moments of disrupting this momentum of following our desires repeatedly, these small moments repeatedly, this will make a difference. This is a system that we're creating of not always succumbing to desires, that creates the possibility for so much more to happen if we're not tangled up in following all of our desires. Maybe just like the British cycling team, it's just a tiny little bit of improvement: disrupt not following this desire, and then not following that one. We have so many of them. Not in a sense that all desires are banned, but to be skillful in them, and to be able to say sometimes, "This is good enough. No thank you. Not now. What in this moment is truly lacking?"

And in this way, if we can subdue some of our desires, and the Buddha pointed out that so much suffering is linked to our desires, then this can create the conditions for our goal, for more freedom. It can help create the system in which we're not being pushed around so much. And the more freedom that we have, the more our capacity grows to be with difficulties and to help others, to help ourselves, to bring the best version of ourselves forward.

So in this way, practicing renunciation, we could reframe it as non-addiction, as not following the siren's call every time. This practice of renunciation can be for our benefit and for the benefit of others. Thank you.