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Be, See, Free, We (4 of 10) The Emptiness Door of Liberation

Today, as we talk about the third door to liberation, we can recognize that our experience of these three doors—the opening to them—is built on developing ourselves. It involves becoming stable, becoming happier, sensing a well-being, and having self-confidence. With this foundation, we can see deeply into the nature of this world. Through seeing, we begin releasing our fixations, until such a point where we can become free to be, to see, to free, and then to open up wider into the community of living beings that we are part of on this planet—to a we that we can share our world with.

That is difficult if we get preoccupied or caught in the sticky spiderweb of self: "me," "myself," and "mine." A big part of Buddhist practice is to become free of this selfishness and self-preoccupation. Specifically, we aim to be free of this spiderweb, this net, the trap of self that is so easy to get caught in. There are a lot of teachings in Buddhism about not-self^[1]. Some people call it "no self," and when they plunge into that teaching directly, they get the wrong impression. They act as if they are supposed to not count, be very self-effacing, or be selfless in a way that is an unhealthy self-denial.

It might be more useful to think of this as a maturation process. We need to recognize that knowing oneself—knowing where one is spatially in relationship to other people, learning the ability to recognize one's own feelings, emotions, and thoughts, and tracking them carefully as we go through the world—requires a kind of self. We can call it a self-focus, an inner focus, and awareness. Mindfulness practice certainly involves waking up to a greater capacity to know ourselves, experiencing the fullness of our thoughts, beliefs, feelings, motivations, and sensations. It is part of the richness of this practice to open to this.

We have to realize that this idea of self is actually developmentally very important for human beings. As children grow up, developing a sense of who they are and cultivating a strong sense of efficacy, confidence, and self-awareness is just part of the deal. It is awkward sometimes growing up and being a young teenager. It is kind of like riding a bicycle. There is a lot of self-consciousness and a lot of self-awareness as we try to find our balance and find our way.

I was thinking about the bicycle analogy. If you are trying to learn how to ride a bike, maybe you are just beginning to get the hang of it. Then, if there are people whose respect you want, suddenly self-consciousness comes into play, and that self-consciousness messes up your ability to ride the bike. Focusing on ourselves is a necessary part of our development. To say "not-self" as a way of dismissing the developmentally important ways in which we become strong, balanced selves does a disservice to people.

It is more useful to think of it as developmentally maturing beyond the limitations of self. We have to have enough self-awareness and self-wisdom to be like the person on the bicycle: eventually, because we become so skilled at living this life, we do not have to be self-conscious anymore. We do not have to be so selfish about all the details of what goes on. Instead, we mature, and a lot of things become second nature. With that foundation of managing and knowing how to get through the world, we can let go in a deeper way. We can move, grow, and flower into a way of being where we are "more," we are bigger, and we are not limited by any self-concept. We might still have self-concepts if they are useful, but we are not fooled by them. We are not constricted or limited by them. We enter into them freely as necessary, and then we are ready to shed them when they are not necessary.

This developmental capacity allows us to live our life as a fully skilled bicycle rider who can unselfconsciously ride the bike with no hands, having freedom in how they are. We do not diminish ourselves by letting go of self-concern, but rather we accept the healthy parts of self-concern and grow beyond it. We learn, especially in meditation, how not to be limited by anything. In mindfulness practice, we see that we are "more."

This is usually not talked about in Buddhism because the danger is that we might identify with the "more." The "more" becomes a thing, and then people hold on to the "more." There is a very strong tendency not to assert anything, because of the danger of identifying with it. Instead, what we do in Theravada^[2] Buddhism is recognize that things are not-self.

If I take this clock we have here in front of me, you know it belongs to IMC. As you can see, it says "Insight" on it, so clearly it is not my clock. I would say it is a clock, but it is not me, myself, or I. It is relatively easy not to identify with a clock as being me. But I could, in some functional way, be concerned about how people think of me depending on the clothes I wear. I hope you realize that this shirt I wear is a very prestigious shirt for a Dharma teacher to wear! [Laughter] My status as a Dharma teacher and your infinite appreciation of me, I am sure, is completely dependent on the shirt that I wear. Now I am really caught up in self and shirts.

But I could also say, "Well, the shirt is not me. I don't have to define myself by my shirt. This shirt is not-self." Then I am more than that. I open up and relax. Functionally, there is a feeling of relaxation and opening, rather than being preoccupied by what you think about my shirt. This can go on and on. As we do mindfulness practice, we start seeing how in our minds, defining "this is who I am" does not really work.

My thoughts, my beliefs, my opinions, my abilities or non-abilities, my physical characteristics—all kinds of things are important and have a role in life, but we do not have to limit ourselves by them or define ourselves by them. As we become more skilled, wise, mature, and confident, we become greater than that.

In Theravada Buddhism, that movement of freedom comes with recognizing: "This is not-self. This is not-self." Anything the eyes can land on, any perception we take in, at some point we say, "Not that, not that, not that." This is not to dismiss anything—everything has a role, time, and place—but rather so we can let go of the clinging and holding. We can understand this as becoming "more." But as soon as we identify with "more," that is a limitation. It becomes a recognition that any particular thing our eyes can land on, or any particular thing we can feel or perceive, is empty of self. It does not qualify as the central organizing agent that controls and runs the whole show of the world.

If we define ourselves, whether as the active agent who does something, or the passive recipient and victim of experience, that central locus of identification around "me, myself, and mine" is seen as "not that, not-self." It is empty of self. When that sense of emptiness, space, and freedom begins to open fully around this idea of self, then a person is said to go through the door of emptiness—that which is empty of self.

Think of the idea of an open, empty door. You can't go through a door if it is shut closed on its frame. But a door that is open—an empty door frame—you can go through. Seeing the empty nature of this thing called "self" allows us not to be limited or become smaller, but to grow, develop, and become more mature and free. It is part of the developmental cycle of human beings. We mature because we are so at ease, peaceful, free, and self-understanding that we trust letting go of holding on to self, measuring self, and being with self.

Functionally, there are times and places where ideas of self are important, and sometimes we coagulate around them in useful ways. But meditation is a laboratory where, hopefully, it is safe. As we sit and allow this natural maturing process to occur, we no longer limit ourselves or hold ourselves back by ideas of self—ideas of a central agent, central receiver, or victim of experience. We open to "more" and become free.

It is not an easy thing, and it is not meant to dismiss anything. It is not meant to limit ourselves or make ourselves less than who we are. It is a maturation, a freedom, a going beyond. The door of emptiness is the door that opens when self-preoccupation and self-concern become quiet and still. That is one of the reasons why meditation is a really important doorway to this. Meditation is a certain kind of becoming more alert while becoming quieter in the mind. We become quieter in self-concern, self-preoccupation, self-definition, and the self-locus. As all that becomes quieter, the emptiness of self, the vastness, and the freedom can open. That is the third door of liberation.

Announcements and Retreat Schedule

In terms of this series of talks, I am going to continue this particular series for three more mornings at 7:00 a.m. This series is becoming a ten-part series because this evening I am going to start a retreat, and I am going to continue with some of these themes during the retreat.

For the retreat, we will join at 7:00 a.m. on YouTube, and then at 4:00 p.m. (California time) there is a Dharma talk for the retreat. I am going to try to broadcast that on YouTube just like this channel, so if you are interested in coming back at 4:00 p.m. or watching it later, you can get the full ten talks I am giving in this series.

I have now covered the three doors of liberation in the mornings. During the retreat, the focus in the mornings will be on being—the beginning of all this, what we cultivate and develop so that we can have the insight and the freedom. So the mornings will be the cultivation. The afternoons of the retreat will be the insights into inconstancy (anicca^[3]), suffering (dukkha^[4]), and not-self (anatta^[5]). Then, by the end of the retreat, we will cover the we—what we open into in the wider sense of our world community.

To make it simple, we will continue with the 7:00 a.m. mornings this week through Sunday. If you want to get the other pieces of these teachings, you can come to the 4:00 p.m. YouTube stream on Friday, Saturday, and Sunday (not today).

I hope you be well and be safe. I hope that you take very good care of yourself, so that in that care you learn to ride your bicycle so unselfconsciously that you can ride through this world totally free. Thank you.