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Pāramīs (9 of 10) Goodwill (Mettā)

So today we come to the ninth of the ten pāramīs^[1]. Maybe they are all ten jewels that live inside of us. Sometimes they are inside of us as jewels in the rough, but with practice, the roughness fades away and they can shine for us.

The ninth one is mettā^[2]. Mettā, as I said before, is usually translated into English as "loving-kindness." Sometimes translating it as the word "loving" puts the bar pretty high for what it is supposed to be. Perhaps a word like "goodwill" or "well-wishing" is a lower bar, and more accessible. The term loving-kindness implies there is supposed to be love for everyone, and perhaps that expectation is a little bit too high. The expectation that there can be tremendous goodwill—that we wish people well generously and honestly—is more approachable. For some people, it is hard to feel love because of the way others behave or the way they have treated us. Sometimes it is just difficult. I do not want to justify not having love, but just acknowledge the fact that it is often very hard. If the expectation is that there has to be love always, then we might not connect to what is a little bit easier.

It is possible to have goodwill even for people we feel uncomfortable with, or even for people we do not like. Rather than feeling ashamed that we feel uncomfortable being with some people, or that someone is challenging for us, we can still tap into our goodwill and well-wishing. Sometimes it is easier from a distance. When we are in the presence of someone who is challenging for us, maybe we have to protect ourselves, take care of ourselves, or it is just too complicated to have goodwill always present. Maybe someday you can have goodwill and loving-kindness present even for situations that are very difficult, but that is something that can build over time. To set the expectation that you are supposed to do that right away can just be very discouraging.

But we can have goodwill for our enemies, and goodwill for the people who are angry with us. We do not have to love them, we do not have to invite them for tea, but we can step back and say, "I sure wish it goes better for this person. I sure hope this person can have a better life and a happier life." I think some of the way they are behaving represents the fact that they are unhappy, and I want them to be happy. That doesn't mean that I have to now just ooze out with love.

The Treatise on the Pāramīs

Regarding the pāramīs, there is an ancient Theravada^[3] Buddhist text about them called the Treatise on the Pāramīs. You can find it on a wonderful website called Access to Insight. It is a website of all kinds of Theravada Buddhist texts, including translations of the suttas^[4]. Bhikkhu Bodhi^[5] has translated this Treatise on the Pāramīs, and I am very fond of the sections that talk about loving-kindness or mettā. I just wanted to read some of them to you because I feel that they really speak to me. These passages inspire me, and I think they talk about loving-kindness and goodwill in a richer way than I could.

This ancient commentary is from around the sixth or seventh century. Bhikkhu Bodhi translates mettā as loving-kindness, so I am going to keep it that way, even though it is not necessarily the only choice that works for people.

"Loving-kindness is mentioned immediately after determination, because loving-kindness perfects the determination to undertake activity for the welfare of others."

That speaks to me so much. Coming out of this practice that I have done, it just seems like the most natural thing to live a life for the welfare of others; that has the greatest meaning. For me personally, I cannot imagine living a life based on anything else. I made a choice almost 40 years ago when I became ordained as a Zen priest that I was going to live a life dedicated towards alleviating suffering in the world. Loving-kindness perfects the determination to undertake activity for the welfare of others. It lists the work of actually providing for the welfare of others right after stating the determination to do so.

"For one determined upon the requisites of enlightenment abides in loving-kindness. Because the undertaking of the activity for the welfare of others proceeds imperturbably only when determination is unshakable."

Determination to practice, the determination to follow the truth, to be resolved on wisdom, truth, renunciation, and peace—it helps the mind become imperturbable, still, steady, and unshakable. And then loving-kindness can be unshakable too.

"Loving-kindness has the characteristic of promoting the welfare of living beings."

This is where the goodwill is: it is promoting welfare even for the people who are our enemies. We want them to be better.

"Its function is to provide for their welfare, or its function is to remove resentment. Its manifestation is kindliness, seeing the agreeable side of beings. Its proximate cause is seeing the agreeable side of beings."

Even with people who we have trouble with, are challenged by, or do not like, there is a practice of looking for what is enjoyable, pleasant, or agreeable about them. Don't harp on the challenges only. It is too easy to have a partial view of people. When we are really challenged by someone, sometimes it is useful to expand the view to see what is good about this person. Is there anything at all?

"The noble qualities of loving-kindness should be reflected upon as follows: One resolved upon one's own welfare cannot achieve success in this world, or a happy rebirth in the life to come, without some concern for the welfare of others."

I do not think much about rebirth myself, but this is a powerful idea. We cannot benefit ourselves without in some way being concerned for what benefits others, and taking care of others.

"If you wish to ultimately lead all beings to Nibbāna^[6], you should begin by wishing for their mundane success here and now."

If you want people to attain spiritual liberation, you should also wish them well in the worldly way. That they are healthy, taken care of, safe, have enough food, and live a basic, healthy life.

I like this one: "One reflects, I cannot provide for the welfare and happiness of others merely by wishing it. Let me put forth effort to accomplish it." That is quite something.

"Now I support them by promoting their welfare and happiness. Afterwards, they will be my companions in sharing the Dhamma^[7]."

We support and help other people out, and one way or another, they then become our companions. Dhamma just means goodness or truth. We are supporting people so that they can come and share with us their goodness, or what is true.

Another thought is, these are all ways of developing loving-kindness. "Without these beings, I could not acquire the requisites of enlightenment. Since they are the cause for the manifestation and perfecting of all the Buddha qualities, these beings are for me a supreme field of merit. The incomparable basis for planting wholesome roots. The ultimate object of reverence."

I interpret this to be all beings, especially the ones who are challenging for us. We need them so we can really develop our own practice and develop the Buddha qualities. All these beings that we live with all around us, they are the supreme field of merit. They are the people to support and to help. In a sense, they are the field of fuel for developing ourselves.

There is a strong idea for some meditators that somehow meditation by itself is going to do all that we need in terms of developing in Buddhism. But we need people too. We need to be involved in some kind of contact with other people, to be concerned with their welfare, to bump against them, be polished by them, get smoothed out by them, and be reflected in them. Our social world is such an important part of Buddhist practice that without it, maybe we don't really develop as fully as we need to—or can—in order to attain full awakening.

"Thus one should arouse an especially strong inclination toward promoting the welfare of all beings. And why should loving-kindness be developed towards all beings? Because it is the foundation for compassion. For when one delights in providing for the welfare and happiness of other beings with an unbounded heart, the desire to remove their affliction and suffering becomes powerful and firmly rooted. And compassion is the first of all qualities issuing from Buddhahood: their footing, foundation, root, head, and chief."

If you have basic goodwill, kindness, and concern for the welfare of others, then you will also develop compassion. Compassion is one of the powerful motivating forces for engaging in Buddhist practice. We practice for ourselves to make ourselves a person who is a benefit and help for other people. Here in the ninth pāramī, there is this powerful call towards having the practice be for the welfare of others.

Conclusion and Announcements

I have a lot of respect for this slow, steady practice. We practice with what we have, what our needs are, and what our situations are. But it is good to know that as we practice, sooner or later, something will shift in our hearts. We will understand that our practice can only keep developing and growing in the field of the world of people around us—caring for them, having goodwill for them, benefiting the world around us, and not just living for ourselves.

So here, through all these pāramīs, we are coming to what germinates inside: these powerful forces of loving-kindness and compassion. May it be that for all of us, as we keep practicing, the sprouts of loving-kindness and compassion just keep growing and growing, so we can live for the welfare of the world.

Thank you very, very much. I just want to remind you that tomorrow at 7:45 AM, we will have a community meeting for those of you from the YouTube community. We will switch to Zoom, and that Zoom information will be posted in the chat, but it is already on the IMC calendar and also on the "What's New" section of IMC. If you want to prepare yourself, you can see where the Zoom link is with the password, and I will talk about it again tomorrow. Thank you.