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Guided Meditation: Ouch and Ahh

So hello everyone, and it kind of warms my heart to be able to sit down here and have the opportunity, the honor, to be able to teach this. So thank you.

Earlier this week, a lot of the emphasis has been staying close to what is directly visible here and now. That which is immediate, the extended moment, the leisurely moment, the ability to really stay here to see what's happening in a deeper way. Responding to a kind of a call: come look into this ability to be calm and settled that comes with this extended present moment. This time you have time for the present, give yourself time for it.

There's also a call to see it, to be here. And what is the call to see? What we're asked to see, what's available to us that's not available when the mind is stressed and jumping around a lot or preoccupied with things, it sees a path to what is wholesome, a path to what is freeing, a path to peace and happiness that is difficult to see if the mind is preoccupied and caught. When the mind is preoccupied, caught, and stressed, that itself more likely is going to help produce more agitation, more anger, fear, greed, and being caught in desires and aversions. But when we take time for this present moment, take time for time, then we have a chance to see something that is maybe hidden from the preoccupied mind.

We can see the difference between what the mind does that has an "ouch" in it and what the mind does that has an "ah" in it. We can see where the mind gets involved in stress, in suffering, and where the mind can be involved in letting go and being peaceful. Where the mind can kind of follow in that which says, "Ah, this is good. This is good." As that path to "ah, this is good" opens up, then things that involve stress, that involve agitation or a lot of energy, that part of it is seen: "Oh, we don't need to do that. Let's go to the 'ah' that's more peaceful and more settled."

So this is the advantage of sitting quietly, being open to the present, and taking your time with it. That something shows up, something appears: come, come see to hear, to see the difference between "Ah, that's an ouch," and "That's an ah." We don't have to analyze it or figure it out to understand why it's there. But in meditation, in that peacefulness, and not doing so much in the mind, allow yourself to go in the direction of the "ah" where it's peaceful and quiet and settled. A lot of wonderful things open up there.

An analogy for this meditation would be that there's something you're searching for that is really fantastic for you. Maybe it's a loved one, a long-lost friend, or a wonderful treasure that you know about, and you're told that you have to follow the clues in the jungle to find it, or clues in the city, wherever you are. And the clues are not so difficult to see if you're quiet and peaceful, if you're attentive and not preoccupied. So you stay attentive. You're motivated: "Wow, yes, I'll follow this trail that's onward-leading to this wonderful thing."

So as we sit today, maybe this can be the orientation: give yourself time for time so that your heart, your mind can be sensitive to what you're doing that's either an "ouch" or an "ah". Lean in the direction of "ah". Trust the "ah". Have confidence that you don't have to be committed to or entangled with the "ouch". Be committed to the "ah", the simplicity of it, the opening to it.

So assuming a meditation posture and gently closing your eyes. Taking a few long, slow, deep breaths. With the exhale, relaxing. With the exhale, making space for time. Leisurely time to breathe in, to breathe out.

Letting your breathing return to normal. No matter how you're breathing, maybe your attitude, your feeling about your breathing can switch from somehow an "ouch" to an "ah". Whatever way you're breathing is okay. Is there a way of holding it, being with it, with a mind that has an "ah" attitude about, "Okay, this is how it is"?

On the exhale, relaxing in your body, and then settling into your body breathing. Maybe with a feeling in the mind, the whole body, that you have infinite time just to be here with your experience here and now. And as you exhale to calm the mind.

For these minutes here meditating, there are many things you don't have to be involved in. It's a good time, an "ah" time, to trust the quieter mind that's not in a hurry. Not trying to engineer something in meditation, just here.

And if you find yourself with thoughts and high feelings, attitudes, emotions which have an "ouch" to them, it's okay. But in the quiet of the meditation, can you feel and sense that there's a way to tap into the "ah"? An upward, wholesome attitude. An easier way of being. Not being entangled. And then as you sit here, being with your breath, be sensitive to the path of "ah". Just "ah" here, now, breathing.

Be quiet enough to feel the direction of "ah". And if there's an "ouch" which remains, see if you can shift a way of being so that your attitude of "ouch" is closer to "ah", something good. So you're not limited by the "ouch", but you move towards the unlimited "ah". It's part of the unlimited now.

And then to end this sitting, consider how when we're stressed and harried, deeply troubled and caught up in things, there might not be much room to feel and sense and take in the humanity of others. To really sense their fullness and who they are, which is maybe deeper than what they say and what they do sometimes. Reflect on what it's like to meet with people when we have time and availability. Our heart is available, we have plenty of time to sense, to feel, to see others. Maybe the time when we feel safe and comfortable, and nothing needs to happen except being together, accompanying someone. In the latter, there are more opportunities for "ah". More opportunities to feel and sense how you can move towards kindness, compassion, generosity, and care.

So at the end of a meditation session, chances are more often than not that in this way of being, you can access a greater degree of healthy sensitivity and a healthy attitude towards others. Give voice to that, take a few moments to give time for what comes out of that as a way of supporting and reinforcing a positive way of being in the world.

To end with a dedication of the benefits: May all beings be happy. May all beings be safe. May all beings be peaceful. May all beings be free. And may each of us have the wisdom and the presence to support this possibility.

Thank you.

Dharmette: The Dharma (4 of 5) Onward Leading

So my friends, we continue now on the characteristics of the Dharma. This little statement is often chanted; it's part of the daily liturgy of Theravada^[1] monastics:

"The Dharma is well spoken by the Buddha. It is visible here. It is immediate now. It invites us to see. It is onward-leading, to be experienced personally by the wise."^[2]

Today the topic is "onward-leading." This is a beautiful and wonderful quality of the Dharma, a quality of this practice we do, that it is onward-leading. It leads to what's really good. It leads to freedom. It leads to peace, to a kind of dharmic happiness. How it leads there is also quite fascinating. We certainly have our role in the practice and walking the path of practice, but there's also a way in which we end up doing this practice in the current that carries us in the direction of what's good and healthy. There's something we discover that leads us to greater peace and happiness. In this way, the Dharma is onward-leading and carries us on.

How does this work? Some of it has to do with this "ouch" and "ah" that I talked about in the meditation today. It might seem simplistic to just orient ourselves to feel and sense things from the point of view of an "ouch" and an "ah," but the benefit is its simplicity. The "ouches" don't have to be understood in all their complicated ways. Whether it's some irritation, finding the meditation cushion too hard, or having some major worldly difficulty happen for us, we just see "ouch." No stories, no complicated things, no trying to understand why.

The same thing applies for the "ah." We can get sensitive to what feels good and feels right, and move in that direction without making it complicated for ourselves. Without appropriating it for self—for "me, myself, and mine" identity. Not making it a big engineering project, trying to understand why we're doing it, or questioning, "What is this all for? Am I doing the right thing?" There's a way of making it so simple that comes from a sensitivity and ability to be really here and present. This is not thinking about things; it's closer to feeling things or experiencing the "ouch" and the "ah." The other advantage of these words is they're more experiential than they are concepts and ideas.

As we're able to stay in our direct experience, in this extended now, and maybe even timeless now, really staying here and relaxing instead of rushing and being ahead of ourselves, we respond to the call to see more carefully what is here. What is this experience? What's going on here? And to simply see, "Oh, that's 'ouch' and that's 'ah'." If I'm breathing in a way that feels a little bit shallow and uncomfortable, I might have a thought that, "Wow, you know, I ate too much breakfast, and I'm always eating too much breakfast, and I'm a lousy breakfast eater, and now I can't be a good meditator." All those sentences, all those attitudes have an "ouch" to them. If you're in the thoughts, if you become the thoughts, then they drive the show, and we almost don't even see the "ouch" in them. But if we're quiet, peaceful, and calm enough, we go, "That's an ouch. There's another ouch. I do a lot of ouches."

These are the second arrows^[3] that we talk about in Buddhism. We might have some discomfort or suffering, and then we add suffering on top of it. There can be layers and layers of self-criticism, blame on the world, anger, despair, or all kinds of extra things. The simplicity is to just say, "Oh, that's an ouch," and have time for that. Not in a hurry, not pushing it away, not judging it, just, "Oh, look at that, that's certainly an ouch."

Because we have lots of time to be here, we can also feel and sense a direction. There's something that opens up in the direction of an "ah". There's a way of being that's onward-leading. In fact, the simple fact that you are giving time and space to feel the "ouch," that is an "ah." That is good. The ability to step back and see it, to be curious and not entangled in it, but to see it from a place of some modicum of calm—that's an "ah." Trust that. Use that as a guide; that is onward-leading. Stay close to the uncomplicated "ah."

If there's an "ah," do we stand and say, "Oh, that's really good, I should really indulge in it, or relish it, this is my chance"? If you give yourself time to feel what's going on and really see it, you'll see the stress in those attitudes. You'll see the "ouch" in it.

The onward-leading way is the way in which mindfulness is self-correcting. Mindfulness gives us information for what is "ouch" and what is "ah." As the practice deepens, we get calmer, and the "ah" opens up to more time and space, more present-moment attention, more sensitivity. It works beautifully to help us not get caught in the "ouches" and to move towards a more and more valuable "ah." A more valuable way of moving towards greater peace or greater freedom.

The word for "onward-leading" in Pali is in that phrase: it's Opanayiko^[4]. The upa- is a prefix that could mean upward. And then -nī is to lead. So upa- can mean upwards, leading upwards, which is kind of a metaphor for moving towards freedom. It also has a meaning of near, leading close to, getting closer. This leads closer to freedom. This leads closer to peace. This leads closer to what really feels right here, full and present. Sometimes we follow that path towards what's onward-leading, bringing us closer. And sometimes what you can feel is that we're being brought there. That the Dharma is leading us. The Dharma is guiding us. We're in the current that flows in that direction.

A lot of what the practice becomes is continuing to open and let go of anything that gets in the way of that process. It's letting go of all the "ouches," all the self-centered efforts we might do. Part of the practice is knowing when to let go, when to trust that process. That takes a very deep sensitivity. It comes from being present in a timeless way, to really feel and sense what's here. So we can sense and feel when it's best for us and most healthy for us, most "ah" for us, to come back, to apply ourselves, and be more actively involved, because the alternative is worse. And when the best alternative is not to do so much, just let go, let go, let go. In that letting go, it feels like being carried and moved along.

It's one of the great aspects of the Dharma that the Dharma is not external to us, it's found inside of us. It's found inside of us in this onward-leading way in which our psychophysical system moves towards freedom given a chance. It has a capacity to move towards the greater "ah," the greater ease, the less stress—to the absence of stress, the absence of strain, the absence of inner oppression that we can often live under.

So try today to go through parts of the day or the whole day and see how simple you can make this. Make this observation of suffering and happiness in your life simple: there's an "ouch" and there's an "ah." See if in that simplicity there's a little more freedom around the "ouches" and a reminder to take a calm, mindful, and greater awareness of the "ah." The possibility that you don't have to sacrifice. That maybe you don't want to ignore, that you want to make space for this "ah," because it's onward-leading. It creates a good environment. It also creates a healthy direction for our social relationships. That's part of the value of this Dharma. It supports our communities and relationships to move in a healthy direction.

So try today, keep it simple. And if you can have enough time to really feel that, maybe you can feel the onward-leading nature, the door that opens up from the "ah" that can take you further in the direction of "ah." Enjoy, and I look forward to giving the last talk in this series tomorrow. Thank you.