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Happy Hour: Nobility of the Mud and Lotus

Introduction

Hello and welcome everyone to this edition of Happy Hour practicing together. Before I hit the record button, we were talking about smoke, fires, lockdowns—so much happening externally and internally. For today's practice, I'd like to invite us to approach the practice of compassion, which is love meeting suffering. For this edition, we'll be practicing self-compassion towards our own suffering, whether we have severe physical pain, suffering, illness, or whether it's emotional, psychological pain of the heart. Not literally, but metaphorically.

There are two invitations tonight for our guided practice. The first is to consider meeting our pain, meaning our suffering or sorrow, surrounding, infusing, and holding it with love. Complete love, the way we would hold a baby, a newborn, a tender young being. Just holding them with tenderness, completely engulfed in love. That's one invitation that I will be weaving through.

The second invitation is considering that our self-sense in the suffering is quite malleable. In the story, of course, there is pain, there is sorrow, there's suffering. And then there are different ways to view it, different self-senses. For example, you can think of the Buddha. His story, instead of one of nobility, service, strength, and awakening, could have been a narrative of: "Oh, I was a prince, I couldn't get out of this prison of a castle, my dad didn't let me get out. And then I got out, and nobody would believe me after I got enlightened. People turned around." So it could be a sense of, "Oh, poor me, poor me," which would be a funny way to even think of that story; it's kind of exaggerated.

But in the same way, can we think of our own suffering, our own pain, our own sorrow, however it shows up, with nobility? With nobility, as if this challenge, this pain—we are bodhisattvas^[1], just like the Buddha before his awakening. We're offering, we're holding this pain in ways maybe we can't quite understand. We're offering it to all beings everywhere for their awakening, for our own awakening, for all sentient beings. Bodhisattva: bodhi (awakening), sattva (sentient beings). For all sentient beings, including ourselves, this suffering, this sorrow, it's the sense of nobility in enduring and offering, in being with this difficulty. That can bring a sense of nobility, strength, and power to being with both the sensitivity and the tenderness in the image of holding with love as if it were a newborn.

So these are two invitations that I will weave through the guided meditation as ways to consider, as ways to enter. I also want to give credit to Rob Burbea^[2]. I heard him mention these ideas as a part of a longer talk, and it just got me thinking that this can be a whole practice. The talk he mentioned this in, just to give it reference, is "Love, Healing, and Emptiness," which I have mentioned before, and I believe Neil has sent it to the sangha^[3] on the Google Groups mailing list. Without further ado, let's start our practice. Let's get into our posture.

Guided Meditation

As always, starting with settling, with arriving. This body, this heart, this breath.

Connecting with each breath, in-breath, out-breath. Just landing and arriving for the first few minutes of this practice on our own pace in our own bodies. Contacting the floor, the cushion, the earth. Each breath filling our hearts, our heart center, our abdomen, our whole body.

Just this breath.

Ah, letting go, relaxing into this body in this moment.

Inviting awareness to be present with the breath, with the body, with whatever is happening in the heart. Gently embracing, touching with your awareness the body, heart, and mind. Fully present with what is present.

Letting each breath, awareness of each breath, radiate, feel more expansive. As if our awareness expands not just through the body but beyond. As if we are sitting comfortably, relaxing into spacious awareness.

Not so much trying to push it and pull it and expand it, just... it's more expansive than we realize. Oh, yes, can relax into this gentle spaciousness. Whole body can relax into it.

Our hearts can relax whatever they're holding in this moment. Our bodies can relax. Into spacious awareness.

And what if this spaciousness is also tinged with care, with gentleness? Permeating through our body, around our body. Holding us as if a soothing blanket. As if our aching heart, our aching body, our mind, is wrapped lovingly.

As if a newborn, a baby wrapped lovingly in this blanket of care. It's okay. It's okay.

Breathing in with each breath, healing, soothing, compassionate love. In this body, around this body.

It's okay. It's okay. With each breath. Here, it's okay.

Soothing, healing, loving, compassionate awareness with each breath.

Experimenting if you wish with putting the palm of your hand in the middle of your chest, the proverbial heart center, connecting with yourself. Holding yourself, this being that is you.

Touch can be so soothing, comforting, healing. Experiment. Something might open up when unexpected. It can also feel empowering. Supporting this being. Sense of empowerment.

This sense of empowerment, nourishing, supporting yourself. Ah, also offering. Offering this challenge, this Dukkha^[4], for the benefit, for the awakening of all sentient beings. As if you are a bodhisattva. Whoever is on this path is a bodhisattva, awakening not for our own sake alone, but for the sake of all beings, all life, all forms of awareness.

Offering this gift, this dark gift of suffering that is opening us up in ways unknown and unseen perhaps as of yet. Training us in compassion and patience and love for ourselves and the world. Offering, enduring, being with this challenge for the benefit of all beings.

Sense of nobility in being with. Opening to more dimensions of meaning, that we are not alone.

Burning with this Dukkha for the benefit of ourselves and others' awakening. In that way, it can be transformed. It may be released, transformed into compassion for ourselves and others. Perseverance, love. Find out for yourself.

Can there be a sense of nobility? In the self-sense, an empowerment of being with this Dukkha, this challenge.

Offered, composted for your own growth, awakening, and those of others.

No mud, no lotus.

This mud, this lotus. As our offering.

Maybe finding you can endure with resilience much more than you thought possible.

And for the last minutes of this practice period, offering the mud and a lotus. The mud of our suffering, our challenge, physically, emotionally, whatever it might be right now. Especially exacerbated by the pandemic.

No mud, no lotus. Offering our mud and the lotus of our awakening, growing in compassion as little or as much as possible. Offering it wholeheartedly for the benefit of all sentient beings.

May this serve. May it serve. May it be of service.

This challenge I have been given, given the causes and conditions, may it be of service to all beings everywhere, and this being who is me in waking up.

May all beings everywhere know their own abundance, their own goodness, their own capacity and beauty, their own magnificence. May all beings be free.

Reflections and Q&A

Thanks everyone. Thank you for your practice. So, a couple of things. Invitations today: the first, the theme of enveloping the challenge, difficulty, and Dukkha with love as if a baby. And then with that, the invitation to hold our heart center or heart with our palm and to bring in a sense of nobility. This sense of self-support, a sense of empowerment supporting ourselves, and then transitioning into this sense of offering the mud, the lotus, our suffering for the benefit of all beings. Changing the self-narrative from one of perhaps "poor me" to a sense of resilience.

I would love to hear your reflections. What you discovered, what was new, what was your insight? Questions, comments for the benefit of all beings or the sangha?

Patricia, who's joining us from Ireland—middle of the night there, 2:00 a.m. or 3:00 a.m. now almost—offers: "Such beautiful practice. Thank you." Thank you, Patricia, for joining and practicing.

You can type in chat your reflections. As always, if it's just typed to me, I will only read the reflection, not say your name. If it's to everyone, I'll read the whole thing. You can also raise your hand, especially if you haven't shared a reflection in a while. What did you discover? Was there a sense of nobility, a sense of opening up as if, "Oh, there is empowerment, there's beauty, there's grace. I can endure, there's so much more here." Did it unearth abilities that you didn't realize you had?

A question comes up from Casey: "What if one is overwhelmed with constant suffering and is tired?"

The overwhelm is probably happening because of the fatigue, because of being tired. There are different possibilities. One is to come back to the body simply, mindfulness of the body and holding. The other, actually, is that this practice can bring up more empowerment, more sense of not being overwhelmed by it. It can change the narrative completely. You can change the narrative from feeling overwhelmed—"It's too much"—to actually, "Wow, as a bodhisattva, here I am. There's so much more that this heart can contain." It can expand our conception, our conceiving. So hang in there, don't give up on it.

Victoria says, "Happy to be back here and being part of this beautiful practice. I was previously familiar with the phrase 'no rain, no flowers.' Really enjoyed this rendition of this, so gracious and delicate. Thank you so much."

You are so welcome. Thank you for joining, Victoria. No rain, no flowers. I like that also.

One more reflection coming in: "I had a sense of separating and sitting above the physical and emotional pain I've experienced this week as we worked through COVID."

Ah, wow. So being above it, sitting above. So this expansiveness above the physical and emotional. Wow, thank you. To me, it sounds from what you wrote that it was a beautiful experience of transcendence, of "Okay, there's so much more here." So, of being in the midst of it, overwhelmed by it, but rising above it. Thank you so much for sharing that reflection anonymously, beautiful.

I'll pause if there are any more reflections or questions.

So we'll save some time on the other end when we come back from small group practice, sharing with each other, and also holding witness for one another in this practice. As always, we'll start with 15 seconds of silent metta^[5]—compassion, empowered for ourselves, for each other. And then you can share as little or as much as you like with your small group. Again, taking care of yourself, taking care of each other in compassion. Small groups are really where the rubber meets the road. Such an important opportunity to be present for yourself, for each other. Slow down. Slow down and listen to yourself. Slow down and listen to one another. This is profound practice. Okay, I will open the rooms now.

[Break for small group practice]

Okay, welcome back everyone. We have a few minutes left for any reflections that came up, especially after discussing and conversing in small groups. Feel free to raise your Zoom hand or type in chat.

We haven't had any verbal comments, so raising your Zoom hand would be great. I see Jerry's physical hand. Let's see Jerry here, you can unmute yourself. Jerry, please.

Jerry: I'm dressed, I know it's crazy. I live in Toronto, but it's so hot and humid here that I had to turn the air conditioning on, and now I have to wear this coat to stay warm in the house. It doesn't make sense. So that's the nature of living in Canada, at least on the east coast. So what I thought about was just at the end of the small group, this whole like... you know, it's been raining a lot here and humid, but the grass looks amazing and the flowers look wonderful. So without rain there's no flowers, or without mud there's no lotus. And I thought, without COVID we wouldn't have met in this particular group. And you know, that was really quite... I sort of thought about it and maybe someone's already said it, but I was like thinking, "Wow, out of necessity was born some beauty."

Nikki: Thank you, Jerry. Yeah, thank you, so true.

And Eileen says in chat, "This was a new perspective for me, nobility in the face of Dukkha. It's different from feeling a second arrow^[6] in the heart." Yes Eileen, well said, beautiful.

Mark asks about the talk I mentioned. The talk on Dharma Seed is by Rob Burbea. A wonderful teacher there, and Neil already put it in chat. Thank you, Neil.

Nicholas, please.

Nicholas: Yeah, this practice really hit, so I might have to talk a little slower. Yeah, I feel like I've just seen very clearly how much life kind of for me centers on the drama of like, "It's my Dukkha, and I have to get rid of it, and I have to figure it out, and it has to mean something to me." And it's really touching, I think the nobility is like just kind of shining on it, you know? It's like... I had my cats fight in the background beautifully. You know, it's just the nobility, it just... there's just that feeling of like the heart just shines on it, and it doesn't do anything specific, it doesn't outsmart it, it doesn't beat it. It's just there. And it's so noble. So yeah, I'm very grateful for this practice today, thank you.

Nikki: Thank you. Thank you, Nicholas. I'm grateful to you for your practice today, and your nobility in showing up for the benefit of all beings, including the being who is Nicholas. That is a profoundly beautiful reflection to end this edition of Happy Hour with. Thank you. And thank you all for showing up, for practicing with all our nobility, all of our mud. As Nicholas beautifully said, nobility can shine. Not to outsmart it, it just shines. It can shine and transform.

So thank you all. May all beings, including ourselves, be well. May all beings, including ourselves, be free. Thank you.